A drunk Port Orchard man crashed his 1993 Isuzu Rodeo into a ditch early Sunday morning, and that’s where this story should have ended. Instead, the 28-year-old decided to fight the power, first by instigating a battle of the wits, eventually with biting above the armpit.
Like a tossed ninja, the man was nowhere to be found when a deputy arrived to investigate the scene of the accident.
Kazaa!! Drunky appeared and admitted the wrecked car was his, but argued that the deputy couldn’t prove he was the one who put it into the ditch. Clever, but the man was bleeding from his elbow and visibly drunk, according to court documents. From the Kitsap Sun:
“When the deputy took a picture of the suspect's injury, the man lunged, biting the officer’s right arm above the armpit.” (1)
End game. The man was arrested and charged with third-degree assault. Bail was set at $86,000. Ouch.