Of the countless Internet videos featuring rednecks endangering their lives with amateur truck jumps, only one deserves to be dubbed the most extreme. I took the liberty to sort through hours of the grisly footage in an effort to find the backwoods man, woman or child befitting of the crown. It wasn’t easy, but in the end one glorious twenty-seven-second clip stood out clearly among the rest. Before skipping down to the video link, take a moment to familiarize yourself with the grading criteria every red neck truck jump should be judged by:
Death is an immediate disqualification. Only sickos want to watch videos of beered-up rednecks launching themselves to an early grave for their drinking buddy’s entertainment. On the other hand, points are also deducted if the driver walks away completely unscathed. The absence of a light to severe back injury from the crushing descent to Earth suggests the junior stunt-person didn’t “push it hard enough” and wasn’t really serious about proving how sexy and reckless they are.
DISTANCE VERSUS HEIGHT
Certain jumpers rocket their trucks into the air at a near vertical angle, appearing to kiss the sweet underbelly of the southern skies with a rusty American bumper. Others will rocket down a highway at 95mph, launching their vehicle one foot in the air over the distance of a football field from the hump of an intersecting railway crossing. Both methods will draw a crowd, but only combinations of the two deserve true consideration as an epic jump.
Something truly horrific has to occur during the jump that inspires profanity-laced hooting and hollering beyond the mere premise of the doomed flight itself. More often than not these unexpected intangibles take place just moments before a pleasing Injury Factor brings the saga to an excruciating final act.
Without further ado, using the criteria established herein to the best of my abilities, I hereby declare the ost extreme red reck truck jump ever to be…
Not only does the driver accomplish a gravity-defying distance versus height ratio, the description of the video clearly states he is also sustained a “pretty serious back injury.” As for the Wow Factor, if you listen closely to the audio, it’s clear by the roar of the truck’s engine he kept the throttle pegged the entire time he was in the air, as any red-blooded showman would.
Well done anonymous Sir. Many a redneck has attempted an extreme truck jump as you did, but none have executed it with such flawless originality. For that, the Internet thanks you.