Community Comment

The new cars require a diet…

Posted by Dave

May 14, 2009 8:22 a.m. • 8 comments

Good morning, Netizens…

There are some David Horsey cartoons that hit far too close to home for personal comfort and this is one of them. While it is true, I have been on a strict weight-loss diet for some time, I recently looked at one of the new super economy cars and found, due to strenuous optimism on my part, I could actually squeeze myself behind the driver’s wheel pretty well, although there were certain space issues still to be met.

Due to the fact I took up most of both front seats, it meant the Queen of the Prom would probably have to sit in the narrow-gauge back seat, and God forbid, if we used the thing to go to Costco for the month, we would need a trailer to haul the groceries home.

The closer I looked, the worse things became.

For example, if we wanted to take a trip to the country with our granddaughters firmly in tow, given that my Saintly spouse would take up most of the back seat while I used both front seats, it meant our granddaughters were either stuck with their heads popping out of the postage-stamp sized trunk, or on good weather days, simply strap them atop the roof as we hurtle down the road.

God forbid we should ever think of visiting yard sales on a Spring Saturday morning!

No, I think we’ll keep our blunderbuss vans that, despite their inefficiency, can carry our entire domicile, including resident pets and grandchildren, wherever we might want to go. Of course, your results might differ.

Dave

Eight comments on this post so far. Add yours!

JeanieSpokane on May 14 at 9:29 a.m.
I really like little cars. I’m short, plump, and squatty - but I still fit nicely in a little car. I have had a Suzuki Swift for 20 years. My significant other, I’ll call him Mechanic Man, is a beefy muscle man and it’s all he can do to get in the car and look normal. Kind of like a big kid on a little trike with his knees up to his ears, hunched over the seat, peering out from under his heavy brows to see where he is going. He never quite makes the “normal” look, while all the time looking like he is wearing the car. He hates it - but likes the gas mileage.
ChefGus/ John Olsen on May 14 at 10:20 a.m.
Dave, do not maunder much on your use of those old “klunker” vans with the souped up engines…. all of the information available says that driving an old car that is already here on earth… is MUCH more energy/environment/cost efficient than even the smallest new car that gets the best mileage being manufactured.

A replacement/rebuilt engine runs about a thousand bucks… and makes most cars like new…. now that is green with a capital G… john
Dave Laird on May 14 at 11:03 a.m.
Good morning, Jeanie…

You wrote in part:

I really like little cars. I’m short, plump, and squatty - but I still fit nicely in a little car.

Oh? Short? Plump? Squatty?

Pardon my failing eyes, but the last time I looked you were a voluptuary, a feast for the eyes and all adorned in those lovely red speedos. You would fit nicely in ANY car. ;-)

Dave
lewis8457 on May 14 at 11:46 a.m.
Last year I rebuilt the top end of my 1987 Dodge 1/2 ton and this year I put a new timing belt in my 1991 Isuzu pup. My dodge gets close to 21 mpg on the freeway and my Isuzu gets 26 mpg in town, the best of both worlds and they are paid off.

The cars of today are nice but they cost at least 12 grand plus comprehensive insurance.

It is a tight fit in the Isuzu with my Danish filled belly and my moose of a dog, if I had a car any smaller the dog would have to stay home. What no dog hair in my Danish?
ChefGus/ John Olsen on May 14 at 3:54 p.m.
The auto in the “car” tooon reminds me of the old Fiat 850 yes that is 850 cc’s of engine size… slightly less than 50 cubic inches… a dear friend owned one and was happy…. so whilst living in Panama City we became the proud owners of a Fiat 124 Sedan which had an 1100 cc engine… got well over thirty miles per gallon and as a boxy squarish vehicle actually had lots of room…. got some of them there newish Radial Tires from Sears from some foreign company called Michelin … and could blow off most anyone in a corner… of course they over took me on the straight away… 30 plus miles per gallon…. When Fiat had made millions of them they sold the plant lock stock and barrel to Russia and it became the famous Lada which you see in all the old movies…..

Another tiny favorite was a Morris Mini Minor rented for a month in England…. it came up to my chest when I stood beside it and had around 1000 cc’s and 40 horsepower. 40 mpg…

So we have done it to ourselves with regards dependence on foreign oil….. noticing that prices on petrol are creepin uppish …. just in time for Memorial day… gus
George_Sands on May 14 at 5:36 p.m.
We once got 12 or was it 16 people in a VW bug back in high school.

Europe has a much richer selection of hoopties and smoke belching cars than the U.S. Trabant, 2C4V, etc.

Great TIME article on 50 Worst Cars of All Time.

http://www.time.com/time/specials/2007/1,28757,1658545,00.html

Be surprised at some of the entries and that a big percentage are modern era cars i.e. circa 1980 - present.
spokelooneh on May 14 at 5:49 p.m.
Gus, a buddy of mine in university had a Fiat 850 Sport. Good thing he was an engineering major and a gearhead, he put 3 engines and a tranny in that thing in two years.

He was returning from summer work in Utah and wanted somebody to drive back to southern cal with him. I flew up to SLC, and we drove it across the “loneliest highway on earth” US 50 across Utah and Nevada, not the most direct route, but we wanted to visit some friends in Lake Tahoe, and go to Yosemite, he’d never been. It made it, barely, over that 11,000 ft. pass in Yosemite.

There are about 5 mountain ranges you cross before you even get to Tahoe. The car was loaded to the gills with his gear and such. We’d speed up on the downhills and valleys, and hit the uphills at about 80 mph, by the time we got to the top, we were lucky to being doing 25 mph.

Fun car to drive in the twisties tho, really nimble, despite its quirks.
ChefGus/ John Olsen on May 15 at 7:00 a.m.
Spokes…. ahhh the 850 sport…. nice little rig with rear engine and Ralph Nader on its butt… had to keep the rear tires at 38 lbs and the fronts at 23 lbs to keep it stable… not “balanced” 50/50 like most sport cars….

Not surprised you had a breakdown or two… but it likely was seriously overloaded… i think the total capacity was 475 lbs ( two drivers and beer…) about the same as my Triumph Bonneville ….. so you may have taxed it’s tiny heart… also people in those days were “taught” to “rev” their little engines to the red line regularly…. and run along at 4500 rpm in second gear around town at 30 mph….

Ever drive a Renault from the early 60’s?? or a Morris Woody?? I learned how to ride motorcycles on a 57Sportster that my freshman room mate owned…

Best and biggest was a built out Dodge Charger with a Big four barrel and a supercharger…. 0-90 in 10 seconds….. gus