Huckleberries Online

SUNDAY, NOV. 20, 2005

Best of HBO (Continued) — 11/17/05

First, you should know that there are only two registered voters in the Coeur d’Alene portion of Precinct 61, due to a freak of annexation: Duane Hagadone’s partner Jerry Jaeger and his wife, Ellen. Oward. In canvassing Precinct 61 after the elections, Huckleberries noticed that Precinct 61 voted unanimously (2-0) for Joe Kunka (pictured) for mayor and Mary Souza, Deanna Goodlander and Steven Foxx for City Council. Only Goodlander won. Seems the voters of Precinct 61 didn’t pay attention to the endorsements in the Hagadone-owned Coeur d’Alene Press (mayor – superb incumbent Sandi Bloem, and council – Souza, Goodlander and Woody McEvers). Will this mean a trip to Duane’s woodshed? Or is this how the HHagadone jumbos really feel about Her Sandiness and other incumbents after the council foiled their try to shut two blocks of Sherman Avenue for a memorial garden last December? Inquiring minds want to know.

Grandest of Old Flags
WWII Navy veteran Jim Shepherd/Coeur d’Alene loves the stars and stripes. He’s carried her in almost every Fourth of July parade since he returned from war 60 years ago. He helped set the Veterans Park bell with a forklift years ago. And his father set the concrete Veterans Park memorial in place before him. Recently, Jim was collecting donated U.S. flags for the American Legion when he stumbled across a boxed flag with a Sherman Avenue address he knew. It was the address of a high school friend who died during WWII on a Pacific island, perhaps Iwo Jima. The 9-foot flag was the special one that’d been draped on his friend’s coffin. Now, it will fly over Jim’s home, located in my neighborhood, every Memorial Day. It couldn’t be in better hands.

Poet’s Corner
Hark the herald angels sing,/“Buy some more of everything!/Cash or check or COD,/Christmas lifts the GDP./Harried, all ye shoppers rise,/charge your bank cards to the skies,/with economists proclaim:/“Spending is the Yuletide aim!”/Hark the herald angels sing,/“Buy some more of everything!” – The Bard of Sherman Avenue (spoofing Charles Wesley’s original hymn, “Hark, The Herald Angels Sing.”) And: “Engaged on his cell phone/while driving his Beamer,/unhappily thus did/he fracture his femur” The Bard (“I-90 Business Call”).

And the answer from Dan Gookin/CDA (pictured) is: “About $5,000.” The Huckleberries Online question? What’s the difference between and university and a college (re: Whitworth College’s announced intention to upgrade to a university) … “Deputy responded to remove a deceased beaver and the log it was carrying at the time of death from the roadway” – Bonner County sheriff’s log. Road kill? And fire wood? In some parts of North Idaho, that’s hard to beat … Did K-County Commish Gus Johnson and CDA mogul Duane Hagadone get into a phone shouting match over the recently defeated local-option sales tax? Secondary sources say so … "Stop supporter terrorists – spend your gas dollars here" – sightem by John Livingston/Spokane, on readerboard of the Maxwell House restaurant/bar in Spokane’s West Central neighborhood … Question: “Do you know why Cougars can’t give change for a dollar?” Answer: “They always lose the fourth quarter!” commenter Eagle Eye.

Parting Shot
The Kootenai County Prosecutor’s Office has a nifty new coloring book to prepare kids for court appearances. Mebbe Prosecutor Bill Douglas should hand them out for adults, too. After all, the book contains good tips. Prior to court appearances, it recommends that kids get a good night’s sleep, dress comfortably and eat a good breakfast. And it provides a good list of rules, such as No. 1: Tell the truth. And how many adults would know what to do if nature calls when they’re on the stand? By the book: “You tell the judge you need to go.” Adult version: Use a euphemism for tinkle.

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Huckleberries Online

D.F. Oliveria started Huckleberries Online on Feb. 16, 2004. Oliveria's Sunday print Huckleberries is a past winner of the national Herb Caen Memorial Column contest.