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Huckleberries Online

Fri., July 28, 2006, 1:47 p.m.

Frum Helen Back: Upscale Fogies Full Of Flatulence

So, Idaho native, you wish you could afford to buy into an upscale neighborhood with a homeowners association? Be careful what you wish for. D.J. Nall's son, Dave, has discovered that Hunter's Glen, his upscale neighborhood near the Ross Point Bible Camp in Post Falls, isn't as nice as he thought. I mean, the homes and yards are nice. But the neighbors who've made an equity killing elsewhere and have too much time on their hands leave something to be desired. First, the snooty retirees behind him complained to the association about the treeless tree house he'd received permission to build about 7 feet above the ground. Dave'd almost completed the structure including roofing and siding to match the house when he was ordered to drop it to ground level. Then, there was the, ah, flatulent noises. Seems the boys, 8 and 5, like kids from the dawn of time, learned how to make that sound by cupping hand under armpit -- you know the one -- that mimicks flatulence and were teaching their 3-year-old sister how to do it, too. Unfortunately, D.J. reports in Hauser Thoughts, that irritated the fuddy-duddies out back. And the seventysomething association prez asked Dave in writing to tell the boys to knock that off, too. Now, their noise-making is limited to the house and the car. Summarizes D.J.: "No wonder youngfolks thik old people are just apain in the butt." Bingo

DFO: This'll probably be the Monday print Huckleberry. I'm posting it today because I won't be here to post it Monday.

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Huckleberries Online

D.F. Oliveria started Huckleberries Online on Feb. 16, 2004. Oliveria's Sunday print Huckleberries is a past winner of the national Herb Caen Memorial Column contest.