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Huckleberries Online

Fortier: “Speak To Me In English”

"You wanna publish articles in Spanish? Here's an idea: PUBLISH A FREAKIN' SPANISH NEWSPAPER! I know I'm a racist for only speaking English, but the language has served me well here in America. In fact, as intolerant as it may sound, I understand people a lot better when they speak to me in English. I remember this one time when I was having a conversation with another American citizen; without even thinking about it, we both just started speaking English to each other. It was weird. Note to the publishers of the Spokane-based rag: If I want to be immersed in the Spanish language, I can take a class at NIC, go on vacation to Puerto Vallarta, or catch a baseball game at Dodger Stadium. But when it comes to my local news, I'd prefer it if you used the same language they used to write the U.S. Constitution. Is that too much to ask?"

For the rest of today's column by Marty Fortier/Coeur d'Alene Press, click here.

DFO: OK, Marty, I'll speak to you in English. Your column today is an embarrassment to this community and to the newspaper that pays for your weakly (sic) attempts at humor. You went too far this time. Nah, it doesn't bother me that you took shots at the SR. Better men have. Harry S Truman comes to mind. But you acted irresponsibly here by showing to the area and (via Internet) the region and the nation that a regular columnist for a local paper is Redneck at best. Mebbe something else at worst. The late Richard Butler would have been proud of your rant. Ditto for the handful of subscribers who quit our paper yesterday because they're small-minded like you. Get a clue, pal.

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Huckleberries Online

D.F. Oliveria started Huckleberries Online on Feb. 16, 2004. Oliveria's Sunday print Huckleberries is a past winner of the national Herb Caen Memorial Column contest.