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Huckleberries Online

TUBOB: Sports Metaphors Don’t Work w/Blogging

That's the one weakness in my online game

DFO, I am rather quite bemused by your ongoing engagement in the blog-as-sports metaphor. It is as if blogging per se is somehow lacking in the manly arts, the testosteronic fury we men insist on grappling with on a nearly constant basis in our lives, and blogging must be jammed into the MANLY CONVERTER and turned into a sports event ... perhaps a solitary athlete out throwing javelins as far as he can or perhaps a noggin knockin' and deep soft tissue bruisin' bout of rugby on a frozen hard field in the dying days of December. As much as I try to force the image from penetrating my placid and pristine mental spring afternoon picnic along a tranquil and limpid pond, I cannot keep the picture of you, DFO, in a Sumo diaper with your legs wide and bent and stomping as you enter the ring to engage your latest opponent, perhaps Larry Spencer in a black leather diaper made from a discarded jacket ...

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Huckleberries Online

D.F. Oliveria started Huckleberries Online on Feb. 16, 2004. Oliveria's Sunday print Huckleberries is a past winner of the national Herb Caen Memorial Column contest.