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The Spokesman-Review Newspaper
Spokane, Washington  Est. May 19, 1883

Huckleberries Online

Dennis: Being A Cop Changed me

Dennis (on being a cop): Then there was the “Personality Change” on my part. Everytime I put my uniform on, I would also don a “Persona Shield”, better described as a mindset to go out on the dangerous streets. My wife would tell her friends that she loved her husband but hated him when he put the uniform on. It also tore her up when I left for work. (I didn't find out about this until after I retired) We lived by the motto that “No News is Good News” meaning that if the phone isn't ringing, everything is ok. At one point, I asked her to go on a “Ride Along” with me so she could see what I was doing. Her response, ” I'll read about it in the paper. Full post below.

Question: Do you have any cops in your family tree?

The woman who “Chose” me to be her husband went in to our marriage knowing she was marrying a Cop who worked in a large agency.

For those of you that don't know, being a “Cops” wife is second only, by a very small margin, to being a soldiers wife. The national average length of Cop marriages is 7 years. Long, irregular hours, dangerous assignments and poor communication plays hell on any relationship. Add to that a by-product of my career was the never ending worry on both our parts of “Running in to” some one that I may have dealt with at one time or another.

Then there was the “Personality Change” on my part. Everytime I put my uniform on, I would also don a “Persona Shield”, better described as a mindset to go out on the dangerous streets. My wife would tell her friends that she loved her husband but hated him when he put the uniform on. It also tore her up when I left for work. (I didn't find out about this until after I retired) We lived by the motto that “No News is Good News” meaning that if the phone isn't ringing, everything is ok.

At one point, I asked her to go on a “Ride Along” with me so she could see what I was doing. Her response, ” I'll read about it in the paper.

A year and a half after my retirement, I was clowning around with my wife and kids when a family friend commented on how happy we were. My wife stated “Yea, I finally got my husband back”. That was when it hit home how hard it had to be for her to be married to a cop.

Why am I telling you all this???? Well,,, in 32 days, my lovely wife and I will celebrate our 30th wedding anneversery. In a way, this is a tribute to the woman that chose me to be her husband. A absolutely adore her and hope that I get another 30 years with her to make up for lost time.



Huckleberries Online

D.F. Oliveria started Huckleberries Online on Feb. 16, 2004. Oliveria's Sunday print Huckleberries is a past winner of the national Herb Caen Memorial Column contest.