BrentA: Bottoms Up

Brent Andrews: I told her most of the people who ever (strip-searched) me never seemed to relish that part of the job. They seemed to like everything else better, in a way. It was just something they had to do because people are crazy, they’ll try to hide drugs in their bottoms or whatever and smuggle them into jail or the mental hospital or wherever. Somebody has to look. I actually kind of feel for those people. They’re probably not making enough money for a job like that.

Question: Can you think of a worse job than strip-searching a prisoner for drugs? (OK: I coulda asked you if you’d ever been strip-searched. But I have to draw the line somewhere. I think.)

Honey and I were talking tonight about how strange it is that we’re only one DUI arrest or whatever away from being naked in front of a strange jail guard and being told to bend over and expose ourselves in the most intimate ways, so they can see if we have any drugs. I’ve been there, on more occasions than I might like to admit, but Honey hasn’t. She’s read about it, though. She’s reading about strip searches right now in a Wally Lamb book. She thinks the searchers are sick. Maybe they are in this book - but those would be the rare ones. I told her most of the people who ever searched me that way never seemed to relish that part of the job. They seemed to like everything else better, in a way. It was just something they had to do because people are crazy, they’ll try to hide drugs in their bottoms or whatever and smuggle them into jail or the mental hospital or wherever. Somebody has to look. I actually kind of feel for those people. They’re probably not making enough money for a job like that.