3 of the many stories from the latest Downtown Coeur d'Alene Bar Report?

• Intoxicated female with dress around waist and breasts exposed fighting with several other females and males. Multiple subjects walking and female has lost shoes and is bleeding from various injuries.
• Suspicious male broke window out of vehicle. Suspect was owner of vehicle but extremely intoxicated and had urinated on himself. He told officers he had lost his keys and used a chunk of concrete to break the window.
• Officers arrested a 48 year old female for DUI (BAC = .171) after a routine traffic stop (driving
  without tail lights). She told the officers she was moving the vehicle to avoid a parking ticket.
• Latest Downtown Coeur d'Alene Bar Report here.

Question: Which of the three individuals mentioned above would you consider most pathetic? Or is there someone else in the latest Downtown Coeur d'Alene Bar Report you'd consider more pathetic?