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FRIDAY, MARCH 9, 2012, 8:48 A.M.

Joker: How Spencer Will Win

HucksOnline asked you Merry Hucksters to paint a scenario in which Larry Spencer could win a Kootenai County commissioner seat -- and Joker responded with this scenario:

"It was a dark and stormy night. A dark blue Mercedes parks in front of a warehouse off of Government Way. Bob Seger’s Night Moves” is playing loudly and Larry Spencer smiles. Outside the warehouse he sees a flashlight turn on and off. It’s time. He turns off the engine and get out. With each step toward the man with the flashligh, the gravel crunches under his boots. The man, a local private eye, hands him a DVD. “It’s all there man,” the private eye says. “Turned my stomach.” Larry starts to giggle, “I know. I know. I can’t wait.” More below.

Question: Can Spencer win?

The private eye grows impatient. “Where is my money? I went through a lot of crap to get that.”

Larry giggles some more. “In the car, let me get it.”

Larry walks over to the car, rummages through the glove box and pulls out a wade of 100 bills and gives it the private eye.

The next morning, Larry holds a press conference in front of the county administration building. “I’ve got a video I want to show all of you.”

He presses play his portable DVD player and the video rolls. Dan Green and Vic Holmes are seen shaking hands with Nancy Pelosi, Bill Clinton and President Obama. The audible gasps from the crowd turn to screams as the camera pans out. They’re at the Gay and Lesbian Allliance Fundraising dinner in San Francisco. Green and Holmes are being honored as the greatest liberals in Idaho.

The next day, Spencer wins a landslide election.

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D.F. Oliveria
Dave Oliveria writes the Huckleberries Online Blog for North Idaho readers and the Huckleberries print column.

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