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Posts tagged: Total Recall

Total Recall: Anger Management

Joker, tongue firmly cheeked, presents his latest (last?) episode of “Total Recall.” This is pure fiction. Any resemblance to real people or actual events is a coincidence: “I want you all to close your eyes and find a happy place,” Bernie told the group. “Imagine your best day. Find that feeling of satisfaction or achievement. Imagine you’re at the beach with your family.” Mary spoke first, yelling, “It’s not working! I am SOOOO ANGRY. I CAN’T STAND IT. Mike Kennedy and Sandi Bloem are spawns of the devil. SOMEBODY NEEDS TO STOP THEM.” Bernie, “That’s ok Mary. The point of this exercise is to find your center. Think about whatever makes you happy and hold it for 30 seconds.” Mary fumed quietly, clenching her fists into a ball until the nails drew blood. Tears ran down her face. The room was silent for 15 seconds when suddenly Frank bellowed, “I am not even sure why I am here. This is a joke right?” More here.

Question: Have you enjoyed Joker's Recall series?

Total Recall: Sweat Shop City

The Joker offers the latest version of “Total Recall” (The following scenario is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to real people or actual events is purely coincidental): The county clerk’s office was busier than usual and the air conditioning wasn’t working. Nancy stared at her computer screen intently. The glare of the screen was beginning to hurt her eyes. It was day four of verifying signatures. The work was tedious and boring. She looked up at the giant digital clock, which was counting down. Over 80 hours left until 4:30 p.m. June 19th. She wondered how in the world they were going to make it. The recall signature lists were a mess. Looking at poorly written signatures for days on end seemingly caused her vision to deteriorate. Cliff entered the room and began passing out bottles of water. “Keep the good work people. I know it’s hard, but you’re doing a great job. Keep it going.” Nancy smiled and took a few minutes to savor the water. It was cold and crisp. The clerk’s office door swung open and Nancy’s smiled disappeared. It was Mary and her entourage. More here.


Total Recall: Copier Blues

The following is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to real people or actual events is purely coincidental.

Frank and Bill arrived at city hall this morning. Each had a black brief case handcuffed to their left wrist. Susan, the city clerk, greeted them with smiles. “Well, good morning gentleman. Are you ready to look at our copy machine? Bill spoke first. “Yes. My glasses have an optical camera on the frame. We’re broadcasting back to our recall offices right now. So don’t try any funny business. Everybody is watching.” Susan slightly startled showed them back to the copier area, “Here it is. Some of the gals call her, Bessy. She’s only two years old.” Frank moved forward and examined the outside of the machine, “Wow. A Canon Color MF9000. That’s a pretty good model.” Bill disagreed. “The factory had some issues with toner carriers. They can slip if the machine hasn’t been maintained properly.” More here.


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About this blog

D.F. Oliveria is a columnist and blogger for The Spokesman-Review. Print Huckleberries is a past winner of the Herb Caen Memorial Column contest by the National Association of Newspaper Columnists. The Readership Institute of Northwestern University cited this blog as a good example of online community journalism.

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