Are We There Yet?

Too much pink?

Posted by Virginia

Jan. 11, 2009 10:15 p.m. • 21 comments

The color pink might be damaging to girls, a recent BBC story suggests. In “Should we not dress girls in pink?” writer Clair Bates interviewed several people who believe it’s not healthy for girls to be “obsessed” with the color.

“We are creating little fluffy pink princess, an image of girliness, that is very specific and which some girls don’t want to go along with, but due to overwhelming peer pressure, are having to conform to,” said Sue Palmer, author of “Toxic Childhood.”

But Bates also interviewed Spokane’s own Michael Gurian, therapist and author of numerous books on raising kids including “Nurture the Nature.” Gurian told the BBC that an overexposure to the color pink (or any other color) has absolutely no biological effects.

“My daughters love pink, but are very successful young women,” Gurian told the BBC. “Their love of pink and of girl stuff has not held them back.”

I have a friend who is especially wary of the Disney princesses. She pointed out to me how “The Little Mermaid,” for instance, can send the wrong message to girls. After all, Ariel had to change herself in order to get the prince.

Do you have a daughter who loves pink? Are you at all concerned about the stereotypes and messages behind the “fluffy pink princess” and other “girly” images?

21 comments on this post so far. Add yours!

MeganCooley on January 11 at 10:45 p.m.
Oh my goodness, I could go on and on here, but I’m heading to bed. Am I that friend, Virginia?

We have two girls, ages 1 and 3, and we try to keep the princesses out of our house. Family members tell us we’re being ridiculous, but we don’t want to raise them on stories about women being rescued by men. We also don’t want them to grow up believing they’re entitled to a princess-like lifestyle.

If my 3 year old brings up the topic on her own, I don’t make an issue of it. I just look for an opening to change the subject when she’s ready.

We do let her watch the movie Shrek, where Princess Fiona is “strong and green.”

As for pink, that doesn’t bother me. It’s just a color. I read recently that not so long ago (and in many countries today) pink was associated with boys and blue was associated with girls. I guess since pink is sort of a watered down red, and red is the color of war and strength, pink was a man-in-training color. And blue was the color of purity and innocence. Something like that. I thought it was interesting.
Cindy_H on January 12 at 9:55 a.m.
Thanks for posting this Virginia. Great timing, I’m working on a “pink” column for next week.
I just can’t believe we really need an expert to reassure us that overexposure to any color has no biological effects!
I have no daughters, but gosh darn it, I LOVE pink, and lace and girly stuff. Can’t see that it’s held me back at all, and my pinkness provides much needed balance in my male-dominated household.
(My husband looks very good in pink, btw)
carolynl on January 12 at 10:27 a.m.
Boy, talk about worrying about something for nothing. My little girl loves pink. She loves princesses. She loves horses and Hello KItty and things that are sparkly and flowery.

She is 4. She did not come to love these thing because of peer pressure. She came to love them because they appeal to her. I tried to fight it at first, but utimately I decided fighting was the worst thing I could do. So she has her pink dresses and her horsies and she watches the princess movies

(Although I agree with Megan that “Little Mermaid” is the worst Disney movie ever, from a feminist perspective. “Beauty and the Beast” is a much better choice. Belle is smart girl who reads a lot, is caring of others and ultimately saves her “prince,” not the other way around. Oh, and she actually wears clothes, unlike Ariel.)

I don’t worry about it too much anymore. For months my daughter loved the movie “Cars” and would talk endlessly about Lightning McQueen. Now she’s all about Pooh and his friends from the Hundred-Acre Wood. We read “Pinkalicious” along with “Leonardo, the Terrible Monster.” She even has a frilly black skirt she calls her “bat skirt” that she just loves.

It’s all about balance people, and perspective. As long as I know my daughter will be able to think for herself and stand up for herself and take pride in herself, she can wear all the pink she likes.
virginiad on January 12 at 1:03 p.m.
Hi Megan! No, you weren’t the friend I had in mind, but you and my friend “J” agree on many points…. My little girl squeals at the sight of pink, by the way. And she’s now a big Dora fan. Dora’s a lot better than Ariel, right? I also kind of like Mulan but she’s never seen that movie. I also don’t see a lot of marketing for Mulan. (Cinderalla, Belle, Ariel and the others — except Snow White — seem to be everywhere.) Is Mulan part of the Disney princess gang?
purplemm on January 12 at 3:35 p.m.
I have a grown son and never thought twice about letting him play with action figures and squirt guns or thah he wanted to wear army camo. He had a baby doll when he was little and played with it about how I would expect a boy to, sometimes hugging it and other times throwing it.

I now also have a 16 month old daughter. I ghad great plans of making sure that I didn’t pigeon hole her into any specific gender type of activities. Then I painted her room pink and purple. Next I was buying was frilly dresses (usually purple). Her favorite toys right now are purses and necklaces and she likes to pretend to put on makeup. Regardless of what color I surround her with or what kinds of toys or clothes I buy for her, I think she still would like the purses. I plan to make sure she is presented with opportunities have strong female role models but I don’t see anything wrong with the princess side of things either.

Do we need to make the opposite assumption for boys? That certain colors like blue or green are wrong. After all boys and girls are different. I think that girls are more likely to be hard wired to be nurturing and compassionate just as much as boys are to be the provider and the protector.

By the way, since I had a boy, I have never seen any of the princess movies that weren’t around in the mid 70’s.
carolynl on January 12 at 3:42 p.m.
Dora’s not too bad. Except what dork thought it would be a great idea to teach children to yell at the television? When my daughter watches Dora, all she does is scream “backpack! Backpack! BACKPACK!” Groan.

And yes, Mulan is a Disney princess, along with Pocahantas, Snow White, Ariel, Cinderella, Aurora (Sleeping Beauty), Jasmine and Belle. When we were at Disney World last year, we “met” Alice (from “Alice in Wonderland”) during our Princess character breakfast.
addyh on January 12 at 3:55 p.m.
My daughter is 16 and still likes pink, although now it’s more of a preppy palette dosed liberally with lime green. Egad, at this rate she’s heading right toward Lily Pulitzer (if she gets a good job out of college and can afford it).
MeganCooley on January 12 at 10:03 p.m.
Now this is a princess room I’d be able to live with:
http://www.ohdeedoh.com/ohdeedoh/look/look-princess-and-the-pea-playroom-073543
je9je9 on January 17 at 11:15 a.m.
Instead of worrying about how colors affected my kids I always worried about the effects of TV and movies as a whole on my kids. The whole Disney empire has a lot to answer for. How about turning off the boob tube and just reading to them when they’re too young to understand the underlying messages?
KassY_KEL on January 21 at 9:13 a.m.
Really though. Parents worry way too much. My mom let me watch all sorts of Disney movies. I wore pink all the time when I was little. I even painted my room pink. Now I am almost 16, and the obsession of pink or Disney has not affected me in any way. I happen to believe that I am perfectly normal, and the color pink will do nothing to your daughters. Neither will Disney. But don’t let them grow up watching TV constantly. That is the worst thing you can do. I taught myself to read at the age of three, and now I would rather read than watch movies.
virginiad on January 21 at 11:47 a.m.
Hi KassY_KEL! Thanks for your perspective. I’ll stop worrying about Disney and let the princesses in our house after all. :) And I agree with you on TV. I hope my children become good readers instead of constantly turning to the television for entertainment.