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Do not make wagers based on this

With the Barclays Premier League season about to start, I'm sure you're wondering how I think it will shake out in English football's top division this season. So here are my picks.

1. Chelsea. 2. Man U. 3. Man City. 4 Tottenham. 5. Arsenal. 6. Liverpool. 7. Sunderland. 8. Newcastle. 9. Aston Villa. 10. Everton. 11. West Brom. 12. Bolton. 13. Blackburn. 14. Stoke City. 15. Fulham. 16. Norwich City. 17. Wolves. 18. QPR. 19. Wigan Athletic. 20. Swansea City.

And be sure to have plenty of HP sauce on hand for weekend-morning breakfasts with channel 401. It's available in a number of Spokane stores.

www.telegraph.co.uk




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The Slice

The online home for Paul Turner's musings and interactions with disciples of The Slice.