Once in a while, some nice person will call me and say something like this.
“I was wondering if, in your column tomorrow, you could…”
Well, no, I couldn't. Because of the features section's production schedule, I write The Slice several days in advance. For instance, my deadline for next Tuesday's column was today. And, at the risk of letting that day's theme out of the bag, I can tell you that it starts with a letter from one of this guy's relatives.