I have to say, throwing yourself in front of a slow-moving bicycle is a pretty poor strategy for ending it all.
Fortunately, it did not work in either of two instances today on my ride home. I missed them.
Maybe things will look brighter to those two rodents in the morning.
But perhaps I have it all wrong. Maybe those squirrels were simply playing, in the words of a great "Far Side" cartoon, "Rusty's in the club!"