The first time I did it, maybe 20 years ago, I used phone books from big cities that were available at the downtown public library.

The project? Ask people from around the country whose last name is "Spokane" how they pronounce it.

So you would think that would be a lot easier to do now that such people can be found online. You would be wrong.

It turns out that people named Spokane in, say, Pennsylvania or Illinois, are seemingly never home during the day and do not return phone calls.

Of course, it could be that my phone messages sound like the ravings of a troubled individual. But I hope I at least come off as a friendly troubled individual.

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