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The Slice

Posts tagged: autumn

Seeing in the season in style

When it officially becomes fall this evening at 7:29, there is a good chance I will be asleep in my chair at home.

Isn't that what the ancient pagans used to do to observe the equinox? Maybe I am thinking of the first day of spring.

Seeing “Oktoberfest” makes you crave…

A) Sausage.

B) Sausage with hot mustard.

C) Sausage with hot mustard and sauerkraut.

D) Sausage with hot mustard and sauerkraut and cold beer.

E) Sausage with hot mustard and sauerkraut and cold beer and a St. Pauli girl lookalike.

F) Other.

Seasonal transitions

Slice reader Rick Shaffer said that, in Wallace, the real question isn't when to switch from short sleeves to long.

“It's more like long pants over shorts.”

How not to dress for leaf-raking

Though as the keeper of the blog credited for this picture notes, the high heels might do a good job of aerating the lawn.

Some signs of season heard, not seen

Sometimes our neighbor's cat appears on the front porch as if Scotty beamed her down from the starship Enterprise.

One moment you're checking the mailbox or whatever and she's nowhere to be seen. And then, out of thin air, she materializes at your feet. If the door is cracked open, she might just appear as a gray blur on her way in to investigate opportunities for seafood treats.

But last night, I could tell she was coming.

Long after dark, I opened the front door and looked out. That's when I heard it.

The sound out there in the blackness was not really a rustling. It was more like a fast series of little splashes.

She was on her way. But because the yard is covered with leaves from our maple tree, I could hear her running. The leaves robbed her of her usual stealth.

I guess it's about time to do a little raking.

Signs of the season on 10/8/11

1. The family ahead of you in line at the grocery store has a pumpkin that's bigger than a couple of the kids.

2. The wild turkeys that stroll through residential areas have gotten big.

3. Geraniums are polishing their last will and testament paperwork.

When does fall really start around here?

A) When the raccoons wave goodbye to the last family closing up a lake place for the season. B) Tuesday and the first grade-schooler “stomachache.” C) When at least a few of the people wearing sweaters aren't complaining about being too warm. D) When the Halloween stuff goes on sale for 2012. E) When the Spokane County Interstellar Fair is over. F) Autumnal equinox. F) When end-of-the-world snow tire commercials start appearing. G) When the first person ignores the city's annual request that homeowners not rake leaves into the street. H) When the first co-worker of several guys obsessed with their NFL fantasy league teams rolls her eyes, sighs and mutters “Oh, for the love of…”  I) When a Spokane TV news anchor first trots out that tired old suggestion that the only reasonable way to view the approach of winter is to be an annoying crybaby.  J) Skiers start to get on your nerves. K) When you have your first flu-shot conversation with someone who spends a lot of time on web sites catering to paranoid morons. L) The first time you think about maybe wearing gloves. M) When we reset the clocks. N) When there's a Slice item about the American arrogance of calling the World Series “the World Series.” O) When you start dreading Thanksgiving. P) When a few movies for adults start showing up. Q) The first debate about celebrating Columbus Day. R) When the first transplanted foliage snob pipes up. S) When seasonal beers that look and taste like something drained from a crankcase start showing up. T) With the arrival of the big Jewish holidays. U) Someone proclaims the WSU or UW  football season “a rebuilding year.” V) Your dog stops shedding. W) Stacks of firewood start appearing. X) When the first Spokane teenager wears shorts on a cold day. Y) When someone critiques the way you eat a caramel apple. Z) Other. 

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About this blog

Features writer Paul Turner is a columnist for The Spokesman-Review in the Features department. He writes "The Slice" column, which appears six times a week and produces general features stories for the Today section.

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