Advertise Here

The Slice

Posts tagged: bicycles

Am I the first person to ever …

…  have to change where he parks his bike at work because of upgraded archives-preservation protocols?

I'm not grousing, by the way. It is zero inconvenience. And I am not clueless about the importance of maintaining archives and preservation issues. I'm married to a former librarian.

Still, I just cannot imagine this having come up before.

But you never know.

Remember the episode of “Mad Men” where a tipsy secretary driving a riding mower in the ad agency's Manhattan offices all but amputates a visiting executive's foot?

I loved when Roger Sterling, reflecting on the incident later, says “Believe me, somewhere in this business, this has happened before.”

Ad of the day

I wonder how much time this model has spent doing dishes.

Bicycle marketing in a different century

Can you name the movie he was in with Jim Brown?

A lot of people claim to have had one

Some are telling the truth.

Bicycles as Christmas presents

A guy at a Spokane bike shop told me that purchases of Christmas-present bicycles tend to be last-minute.

I guess the “Where to store it?” question is one consideration.

And then there's the matter of coordinating with Santa.

Ever get a new bike for Christmas?

Eighty bucks was a lot of money 50 years ago.

Premarital waving

I honestly can't remember girls riding these. You?

I'm sure they did. Just can't summon any memories of seeing it.

Yelling at scofflaw sidewalk bicyclists

There are problems with reminding people that it violates a city law to ride a bike on sidewalks downtown. Here are five.

1. Yelling doesn't always produce learning.

2. To the listener, outdoor yelling often sounds like “Hey! Buzza globben and yule stamper doobie jackslob!”

3. “You're making every cyclist look bad!” doesn't really resonate with those who do not in any way view themselves as part of Spokane's cycling community.

4. The audience for this message is not exactly ablaze with desire to live life inside the margins of civil society.

5. The offenders are thinking, “Where's your badge?” 

2012 bicycling stamps

Other headlines that might have attracted a similar number of readers to this blog:

“Planning board sets meeting”

“New pastor has positive outlook”

“Spokane Indians ready for 23-game schedule”

“Local woman fills spare time”

One of these two things must be true

1. An astonishingly high percentage of bike riders must be thieves.

2. A lot of people must be willing to buy bicycles or accessories from sources other than reputable bike shops — sources that may or may not have obtained the bikes or parts legally.

What else is there to conclude? If you talk to bike riders, you never stop hearing about stolen bicycles, ripped-off seats, et cetera.

Another hippie bicyclist

Of course, anyone who read “Ball Four” might quibble with the suggestion that he was dedicated to fitness as a player. Still, I like this picture.

Dependable vs. temperamental

Had taken my two bikes in for tuneups last weekend and drove over to pick them up this afternoon.

My original plan had been to wait until Saturday to walk over and ride one home and then walk back and ride home again. But it looks like the streets will be sloppy by then. And I don't really want to coat my brand new chains with winter road grime two seconds after leaving the shop.

My bikes, which are identical except for the horns, were not expensive when I bought them in 2008. I”m quite sure that what I have paid for tuneups over the years eclipses what I shelled out to purchase them.

But I think most of us have places we feel good about supporting. That's certainly how I feel about my bike shop. They have treated me well. And I enjoy talking with the young guys who work there.

The first employee I ever met there, back in the summer of '08, was Joe Perrizo. And he was at the cash register this afternoon as I paid for the tuneups.

I had asked how come they listen to an oldies station in the shop. (They like the songs.) And I was in the middle of telling him a fascinating story about the Monkees tune being played at the moment when we heard an urgent hissing.

I had no idea what was happening. But Joe figured it out.

One of the expensive racing bikes up on a wall to my left had suddenly lost the air in a tire. And it wasn't even being ridden.

Prima donna.

Neither of my no-nonsense bikes would ever pull a stunt like that.

I wish everyone could have a new bike

Perhaps the formula isn't quite that simple. Maybe you also need a pet sleeping on your bed and cowboy boots.

Apparently nobody else got presents

And what's with that backdrop? Is that house on the edge of the flat Earth?

Get blog updates by email

About this blog

Features writer Paul Turner is a columnist for The Spokesman-Review in the Features department. He writes "The Slice" column, which appears six times a week and produces general features stories for the Today section.

Latest comments »

Read all the posts from recent conversations on The Slice.

Search this blog
Subscribe to this blog
Advertise Here