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Posts tagged: PB&J

Feats of daring in everyday life

Sometimes circumstances arise where a person will sit down with a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and only then realize that he does not have something to drink.

“Bad word.”

The only sane thing to do, of course, is to get up and fetch a glass a milk. Just takes a minute.

But what if that individual is extremely comfortable where he is and doesn't really feel like rousing himself? Well, one option is to tell himself that he can manage to eat the sandwich without benefit of dairy-product lubrication.

That's a mistake.

There is no need to go into the gummy details of esophageal impaction or point out the folly of thinking “Maybe if I just keep eating, the blockage will clear itself.”

Nor is there anything to be gained here by alluding to scenes from “House” or other entertainment offerings featuring medical personnel jabbing holes in people's throats. (Besides, that is usually done to clear the airway — not to dislodge an obstructionist snack.)

So let's just call eating a PB&J without having something at hand with which to wash it down exactly what it is — a high-wire act.

Sure, you might pull it off. But do you really want to take the chance?

Remember, calling out for help from your recliner might not do much good if you seem to be saying “Mmmphfffgaaaaaa.”     

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About this blog

Features writer Paul Turner is a columnist for The Spokesman-Review in the Features department. He writes "The Slice" column, which appears six times a week and produces general features stories for the Today section.

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