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Posts tagged: random observations

Two key questions

1. Who around here has set foot on the greatest number of Air Force bases that now do not exist?

2. What was it like to grow up as a kid who used an inhaler and see every inhaler-user in movies and TV shows be depicted as a loser?

Three things

1. The problem with turning off the ringer on your portable phone is that, if you misplace it, calling that number to locate it doesn't work quite so well.

2. You know those movies where men get together for some sort of blowout before the inevitability of adulthood or death? Sure. Well, some of us find those films pretty easy to resist.

3. Does it feel to you as if today is the real start of the new year? 

First and 10

1. I'm sorry, the bike lanes downtown right next to streetside parking spaces make no sense to me.  

2. If some loud TV idiocy has been blaring at you in a medical waiting room, it could be that your subsequent blood-pressure reading will be artificially high.   

3. Understandable regard for nostalgia and lost innocence aside, does anyone watching 1998's “Pleasantville” actively root for the Big Brother forces of social conformity?

4. One entertaining aspect of sailing out of Bayview is wondering if the Navy is conducting experiments directly beneath you.

5. Honalee is not a Spokane Valley neigborhood.

6. Inconsiderate space hogs are the exception on the Fish Lake Trail.

7. Assuming you do not automatically loathe every last one of them, do you find that your favorite celebrities invariably turn out to be the ones capable of keeping at least a few things to themselves?

8. A couple of the biggest pumpkins I have ever seen are growing just a few blocks from my home. But that's all I feel at liberty to say. (I spoke to the guy growing them, and apparently these monsters are no accident.)

9. One thing about people at the office having fights with spouses/sig others via silent electronic communications (instead of over the phone) is that you no longer have the chance to quote .38 Special once they have stormed off to the restroom. You know, “You see it all around you…Good lovin' gone bad.”  

10. What must have been a large, well-fed bird dropped a rude comment on my Sunday paper early yesterday morning. The two-toned splotch was about the size of a peanutbutter jar lid. My wife took a picture and tweeted it. She immediately heard from a friend in Chicago who wondered if the bird was weighing in on the state of newspapers in 2012.

In any case, let's hear it for those plastic bags. Talk about a big save.

Spend time at retirement communities

And you start getting used to two things.

1. Hearing “See you in the funny papers” while there.

2. Being told “You're talking too loud” after you leave.

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About this blog

Features writer Paul Turner is a columnist for The Spokesman-Review in the Features department. He writes "The Slice" column, which appears six times a week and produces general features stories for the Today section.

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