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The Slice

Posts tagged: tattoos

How to sound like a non-success

KXLY's Melissa Luck made an interesting observation on Twitter the other day.

“If you're thinking about getting a tattoo, think about how silly it might sound if a dispatcher is describing it over a police scanner.”

What’s your policy on tattoos?

A) I think they are insane. B) I have one. C) I have several. D) My entire neck is covered with them. E) I did many dumb things when I was young. But thank heaven this hadn't become mainstream before I turned into a sour old grump. F) When I learned that my daughter had one just above her backside I realized that I was a failure as a parent. G) Other. 

www.rollingstones.com

This date in Slice history (1997)

Just wondering: What is the Inland Northwest's most common tattoo?

Today’s SR staffer tattoo

www.kirotv.com

OK, this gentleman doesn't actually work here. I was trying to make you look.

This date in Slice history (1995)

Today's Slice questions: If you were to get a tattoo that expressed your feelings about the Spokane area, what would it say? Where on your body would you want it?

Body work

What would you guess is the No. 1 most popular Spokane area structure, inhabitant or natural feature used as inspiration for locally-themed tattoos? The Clock Tower? The jail? Lilacs? Feral cats? An RV?

When the truth just won’t work

I wouldn't presume to speculate about why people get tattoos on their neck and face.

I'm sure they have their reasons.

But you have to wonder. Who would hire these folks? Perhaps employers with lots of behind-the-scenes positions to fill.

Anyway, I suspect a small percentage of those with these high-profile decorations eventually regret adorning themselves thusly. And for those individuals, I have a recommendation.

Lie.

Ordinarily, that's not the best policy, as you might have heard. But if you have tattoos all over your face and neck and find yourself at a job interview, here's what I suggest.

Declare that you are a Maori tribesman from New Zealand.

And then stick with that story.

“So, um, that was before you dropped out of Shadle?”

“That's correct.”

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About this blog

Features writer Paul Turner is a columnist for The Spokesman-Review in the Features department. He writes "The Slice" column, which appears six times a week and produces general features stories for the Today section.

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