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Sandy Koufax relieved himself here

Cracking a big-league roster is a magical moment, and someone asked Dodgers rookie Todd Hollandsworth just when he realized he’d arrived.

“I didn’t think I’d be that excited about opening day,” he said, “but then I went to the bathroom and thought, ‘Wow, I just used my first big-league bathroom.’ I guess that’s when it hit me.”

Doesn’t it usually hit you before you go to the bathroom?

Don’t touch that dial

Like Bill Clinton, George Karl has had it with talk radio. Never mind that the Sonics coach is part of the problem - having his own radio show and all.

On the eve of the NBA playoffs, it was pointed out to Karl that he had “guaranteed” back in February his Seattle SuperSonics would beat the Lakers in the playoffs - though at the time the Lakers had won four straight from the Sonics.

“It was stupid,” Karl said. “What’s the difference now? I got tired of people talking on the radio talk shows about the Lakers. I’m not guaranteeing it now.”

Karl went on to talk about how radio perpetuates perceptions and not facts, and that he’s tired of the entire talk-show situation.

“I’ve already talked to KJR about canceling the talk show,” Karl said. “I don’t want to be a part of that.”

A part of what? Putting your foot in your mouth?

A nostalgic stroll through marketing hell

Canada’s tradition-bound hockey fans have been decrying the Yank-ifying of their hockey arenas with non-stop music, videos and assorted promotional gambits - something the Anaheim Mighty Ducks have turned into an art form.

But if it’s any consolation, it could be worse. It has been worse.

Tom Lockhart, a Madison Square Garden promoter of the 1930s, once enlisted a live bear on skates to jazz up the pregame proceedings before a Hershey Bears AHL game. Problem was, the bear’s trainer fell flat on his face and was dragged around the rink clutching the animal’s leash.

In Pittsburgh, the animal kingdom didn’t fare as well. Upon joining he league in 1967, the Pittsburgh Penguins’ bright idea was to use a live mascot. Pete the Penguin never did adapt to his new surroundings at “The Igloo,” dying of pneumonia before the end of the season.

We’ll never forget old Whatzisname

Golfer Mike Springer can tell Greater Greensboro Open winner Jim Gallagher Jr. that there’s not a lot of residual recognition with that honor beyond cashing the check.

Before this year’s tournament, Springer - the 1994 champ - sat down in the interview room and searched the trophy for his name.

“I can’t believe they didn’t put my name on the trophy after taking a year to send it to me,” Springer said. “Well, not quite a year, but it took quite a while.”

The last word …

“I bought this very rare item - a tax form signed by Darryl Strawberry. That’s the hottest thing out there now.”

- Comedian Billy Crystal, on sports memorabilia