Helpful Adults Counteract Problems

Adults can make a difference for troubled children, researchers say.

“You need a person who believes in you,” said University of Alabama researcher Eurnestine Brown.

“If you can’t get it at home, you need to find it elsewhere. You need to look through somebody else’s eyes and see yourself in a positive way.”

In a 10-year study of children of depressed mothers, Brown and her colleagues found resilient children were more outgoing and intelligent than troubled children. These traits enabled them to connect with teachers and peers.

Adults in their lives bolstered their positive self-images.

A pleasing smile, a sense of humor, an ability to solve problems and a talent or hobby buffered the children from serious emotional problems and attracted caring people to them.

“Being able to separate themselves from some of the negative influences in their lives helped,” Brown added. “Those kids who could separate from their mothers’ depression did much better. ‘My mom has a problem. That doesn’t mean I have a problem.”’

While other psychologists study factors leading to failure, resiliency researchers offer hope.

Their findings feed programs like Maryland’s Tomorrow, which gives 7,500 potential dropouts in Maryland year-round help, including tutoring, mentoring, leadership training, work experience and career planning.

The program has lasted seven years and shows remarkable results.

Studies comparing Maryland’s Tomorrow students to other kids like them found fewer dropouts, higher test scores and higher grades.

Resiliency research “runs counter to the dysfunctional movement,” said Charles Shelton, a clinical psychologist and Jesuit priest at Regis University in Denver, Colo.

“In the popular mind there’s this fatalism that the home environment is such a strong force. I think that’s overplayed. You’re not consigned to a morose, totally helpless future just because your parents drank.”

, DataTimes