We’ve Seen Screen Sexy, And We Spell It Sarandon

Loose talk

Lauren Bacall on criticism: “I don’t like being judged by no-talents. My talent, however small it is, is bigger than the people who are judging me.”

Some women are still livid over Sally Field’s role opposite Tom Hanks in “Forrest Gump.” “In ‘Punchline’ they’re lovers, and now she’s his mother?” one complained.

That’s the way it goes in Hollywood, where the Year of the Woman didn’t last but maybe a moment. Actress Susan Sarandon, 48, thinks she know why this is.

“Maybe because we’re such a young country that we haven’t resolved the issue of our mothers, and so many men trade in their women for younger versions,” she said during a publicity junket for her new film “Little Women.” “It seems to be all right to have sex with very young women, but not with someone your own age.”

Sarandon, the mother of three, is a rarity - an aging sex symbol. “I feel like the oldest ovary-producing person in America,” she said.

He plans to sleep late and enjoy his REMs

Michael Stipe turns 35 today.

Manilow, Twinkies, Pocket protectors… the list goes on

Rapper Michael Diamond, who’s as caucasian as they come, is a bit confused. “I just don’t understand white people,” the Beastie Boy says. “White people like stuff that is so overtly wack. Sound Asylum, Rush, Sports Illustrated.”

In some parts of Holland, Vedder is the word for dirge

Eddie Vedder marvels at the vagaries of fame. “I saw this soul singer who told me how people come up to him and say how they have fallen in love to his music, and that they romanced to his music,” Pearl Jam’s lead singer told Spin magazine. “It was a very nice thing. I thought, what a huge relief to have someone tell you that rather than ‘I was going to commit suicide until I heard your song,’ or ‘We played your music at my friend’s funeral.”’

Note to Winona: Never ask the media a leading question

Watch out what you write about Winona Ryder’s dating habits. “I am most offended by what I read about my love life,” she told the Nashville Tennessean. “I am 23 years old and I have had two significant relationships. Is that being a floozy?”

And in his spare time, he loves to fire the surgeon general

Mandy Patinkin says he is amply qualified to portray a surgeon on the television drama “Chicago Hope.” “I don’t know everything you need to know, obviously, but I could certainly hold all of the instruments and I could certainly sew,” he said.

Remember, Jim, Pee-wee Herman once was popular, too

Asked to explain the success of his three 1994 movies, Jim Carrey just shakes his head. “Society is a lot more twisted than I thought,” he told People magazine.

The following fields overflowed: CREDIT = Compiled by staff writer Dan Webster