The Hot Seat A Weekly Look At People And Issues In The News
Jesse Helms, the behavior cop
Sen. Jesse Helms wants to slash federal AIDS spending because sufferers contract the disease through “deliberate, disgusting, revolting conduct.” But many people think cigarette smoking is deliberate, disgusting, revolting conduct. So, will the Republican from tobacco country call for huge cuts in research funding for lung cancer, heart disease and other ailments caused by cigarette smoke? Obviously not. But Helms can’t help himself. Besides, his mean-mindedness is finally fashionable and what could more chic-politic than denying help to sick people?
What happens if these inspectors get head colds?
The only thing standing between meat eaters and food poisoning are the sensitive schnozolas of USDA inspectors. They poke the pork and sniff the steak to find bacteria before it finds us. This scratch-and-sniff system needs an overhaul, but Republicans and the meat industry are singing the over-regulation blues. And Clinton’s promised the scratchand-sniffers a job whether they’re needed or not under a better system. He faults Congress for pandering to industry, blah, blah, bleeh, blah, blah. Meanwhile, thousands die and millions get sick from bad meat every year.
What day is the fireworks show?
Anybody know what date the Fourth of July falls on every year? Anyone ever heard of the fireworks show in Riverfront Park that night? If you know the answers please call the Opera House and tell them. Maybe then they won’t book a show that causes the annual fireworks display to start late. It looks bad for a city that prides itself on being a nice place to raise family to make nearly 100,000 people, many of them kids, wait an extra twenty minutes so a bunch of grown-ups can hear Carol Channing belt out the final numbers in Hello Dolly.
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MEMO: The Hot Seat is an irreverent look at controversial issues in the news. The views expressed are those of the writer. Today’s Hot Seat was written by Scott Sines