Some Parents Are Bad Sports

While sitting at a recent sporting event, I heard an outraged women hiss behind me, “My son’s still sitting out.”

A man seated next to her, apparently incredulous, asked, “Your son? Why? Is he still hurt,” he said.

“No,” the woman replied, angry beyond belief, “He’s ready to play again. It’s just that the coach is a jerk.”

And the bad-mouthing did not stop there. It continued for the rest of the game, her comments becoming increasingly caustic. When one of the other parents began chipping in, I got up and left.

I suppose I’m rather biased against this sour lady because I respect and like the coach she was speaking so harshly of. I rather pity her. The poor mother’s attitude seemed to flow strictly from her shame. She felt embarrassed that her son was crouching on the sideline instead of standing on the field.

Should a parent become so involved in their child’s sporting life?

Don’t get me wrong, I love having my parents cheer for me at soccer games and track meets. I love having them drive me five hours to Seattle for a single game. I love having them stand in the bleachers, soaked with rain and screaming, “Go Sharma!”

What I don’t love is parents jumping into teams and ripping them apart simply because their “little Sally” or “little Bobby” doesn’t get enough playing time.

The truth is, some overcompetitive parents chose to ignore depressing facts. Maybe the coach wants to wait a little longer to ensure an injury has healed correctly. Maybe the kid is a goof-off or smart aleck at practice. Maybe he or she doesn’t work well with others. Maybe, despairingly, their child just isn’t good enough.

A single aggravated parent can tip other aggravated parents in a camaraderie of dominoes, sometimes leading to a inner-squad brawl which demoralizes a team.

Or, in a more disastrous event, upset parents can even prompt the coaches’ dismissal which is one of the most unpleasant occurrences a team can endure (whether the coach is loved or despised).

A team does not need this sort of activity. It should be working together, not fighting amongst one another.

What parents must understand before hurling insults or instigating upheavals is this: Coaches are only human.

Yes, like all of us, they sometimes seethe with rage; yes, like all of us, they sometimes make a mistake; yes, like all of us, they sometimes act a little thoughtlessly.

And yet, like most of us, they love to see all of us receive recognition, playing time and rewards. They love to see us improve, and that is why they are coaching.

If you, as a parent, find yourself fuming at your child’s coach, for whatever reason, dig a little deeper for some supporting evidence.

Talk to other team members, their parents, and especially communicate with the coach and your son or daughter.

Trying to encounter the true problem may save the team from future heartache.