If You Like Wrestling Matches, Then You’ll Love ‘Quest’

The more things change, the more Jean-Claude Van Damme stays the same.

Most action heroes have moved on to other genres, but Van Damme sticks with what he does best: kick-boxing. “The Quest,” which he also directed, is about a Tibetan competition in which wrestlers and kick-boxers from many different countries battle each other while wearing the get-ups of their native lands (note to Van Damme: Africa is not a country). It’s like a cross between the World Wrestling Federation and the parade of state costumes at the beginning of the Miss USA Pageant.

“The Quest” may refer to Van Damme’s effort to win the competition with the help of sidekick Roger Moore, or to his struggle to travel from China to his home in America, or to Van Damme’s attempt to pronounce the word “crest.” It hardly matters. Virtually plotless, “The Quest” is just an excuse to set up 45 solid minutes of nutty wrestling matches.

As an actor, Van Damme spends most of his time neutralizing opponents with his bare hands (heck, the movie’s so choppy it looks like he edited it with his bare hands). As a director, he uses a lot of slow-motion shots, and you haven’t lived until you’ve seen a sumo wrestler’s gut undulating in slo-mo. Van Damme also is forced to guide the performance of Moore, which is the thespian equivalent of the blind leading the blind.

Most of the actors are pretty atrocious. The only way to enjoy “The Quest” is to think of it as the equivalent of one of those wrestling grudge matches that cost you $20 to watch on pay-per-view TV. If that appeals to you, “The Quest” will save you about 13 bucks.

MEMO: This sidebar appeared with the story: “THE QUEST” Locations: Lincoln Heights, North Division and Coeur d’Alene cinemas Credits: Directed by Jean-Claude Van Damme; starring Van Damme, Roger Moore Running time: 1:35 Rating: PG-13