Cheap Seats
Get your tickets, please!
Back in 1979, when you were young and foolish and living back east, you did something really crazy like apply for Boston Celtics season tickets. You couldn’t afford them then, but it didn’t matter because there were about 6,000 people ahead of you on the waiting list.
While you’ve sobered up and gotten a job since then, though, the Celtics have hit the skids. And now those season tickets could be yours.
That’s the crux of a new ad campaign the Celtics are using this summer as they make their first real dent in the waiting list since Larry Bird started kicking tail and the sales staff started taking names.
The ads ask those who are on the season-ticket waiting list to call and let the team know their new whereabouts.
The team expects to meet its goal of 10,500 season tickets in the 18,854-seat FleetCenter - about 4,000 seats more than the old Boston Garden.
No, the package doesn’t promise the return of Bird, Parish, McHale, DJ and Ainge.
Speeding down Dan O’Brien Parkway
Olympic decathlon champion Dan O’Brien made a quick visit to his hometown of Klamath Falls, Ore., where officials hope to name a street for him.
County Commissioners want to change Foothills Boulevard to Dan O’Brien Parkway. The street was previously known as Beverly Drive and Johnson Road.
At least one resident of the street says the name has already been changed too many times, and he’s tired of having new checks printed.
“They should have done it before they changed it the first time,” Neil Hicks said. “There’s bound to be another road.”
The minor league rat race
When the Canton-Akron Indians of the Eastern League move from Canton to Akron next year, the nickname will likely change to something that fits their new surroundings.
The club’s future hometown newspaper, the Akron Beacon Journal, said the rumored names include the Canal Rats - invoking the history of the Ohio Canal winding dits way through Akron.
Or why not just name the team the Albert Rats as a tribute to Northeastern Ohio’s favorite player?
Life in the CFL doesn’t pay
Here’s another reason why it pays to make it in the NFL rather than settle for the Canadian Football League.
Those who invest wisely might not find the need to steal Make-A-Wish Foundation collection canisters from convenience stores.
Former Winnipeg Blue Bombers defensive end Keilly Rush of suburban Pittsburgh did just that in June, swiping $8.60 from a collection jar. The money was to be used to help sick children fulfill their dreams. Rush also stole a woman’s purse and used her credit card to buy tires, stereo equipment and a motel room. He led police on a three-mile chase before being caught July 20. Prosecutors will recommend Rush serve two years of probation.
The last word . . .
“Carl Lewis will not be featured on the Wheaties box. However, he will have his picture on a brand new breakfast cereal from Post - Sour Grape Nuts.”
- Late night talk show host David Letterman
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