Melissa Answers Star Takes On Readers’ Questions About Her Career, Personal Life
Nobody has more loyal fans than Melissa Etheridge.
So we asked them to submit their own questions, which we relayed to her during our recent phone interview.
The questions were personal as well as musical, which should come as no surprise. Etheridge’s private life is public knowledge these days. She and her partner, Julie Cypher, made the cover of Newsweek on Nov. 4 with the headline, “We’re Having a Baby: Can Gay Couples Gain Acceptance?” Cypher is pregnant, and she and Etheridge plan to raise the baby as a couple.
Here’s the interview:
Q: What kind of songs do you plan to sing to the baby?
A: Oh, ones that my mother sang to me. I think I will pay attention to the content of some of those, because I think a lot of them were very violent. “Down will come baby” - (laughs) I’m just not going to sing that. (Sings) “You’re gonna be up in a tree, and you’re going to fall, and its gonna hurt” (laughs).
I’m sure I’ll make up my own little things to sing, too.
Q: Is it more acceptable to be homosexual in the music industry than in TV, in light of the “Ellen” flap?
A: I don’t know. I find the music industry has been very accepting, as long as you’re doing well. Ultimately, it comes down to the business of it. Your personal lifestyle, if you choose to reveal it, as long as your business is still doing good, will be accepted.
I think the record-buying public made a statement with my last album when they said, “So what,” or “That’s fine,” or “We knew that,” and they bought the album.
Absolutely, there was a fear of losing everything, because it’s such an unknown. But the alternative was impossible: I couldn’t hide, I couldn’t lie. It was just impossible.
Q: Do you think fans get a little too obsessed with their favorite rock icons? And your fans in particular?
A: It’s interesting. I think there is a small percentage of people who get obsessed in general, to a dangerous level. And I think the state of mental health doesn’t cover that enough.
But the majority of my fans are music-loving people who my music has touched, and I love seeing them get into the show and I’m not afraid of them at all.
Q: Do you watch yourself on video playback, and what do you think of your own performance if you do?
A: No, I don’t watch myself very often. There are times when something happens that I want to see again, special moments, and I sometimes find it uncomfortable to watch myself. But I never want to think that onstage, because I never want to stop natural things onstage, to think, “Oh, I’ll just look stupid.”
Q: What has surprised you about being famous?
A: It’s a lot more work (laughs). I have to really center myself, because it seems like waves; you’re on top of one, and “Ooh, this is great,” but it doesn’t last. You have to have a really solid foundation to know that it’s up and down.
Q: How are you treated differently by family and friends?
A: My close, close family certainly doesn’t treat me any differently, and neither do my close, close friends. They do very well at keeping me very humble.
Beyond that, there are the sort of extended family, distant relatives; they came out of the woodwork, and it’s hard. “Yeah, I’m related to you, but I met you once.” I try to be hospitable to that, but, you know, it could take up all my time. Same with friends; some friends couldn’t handle the lifestyle change. Some friendships went by the wayside.
Q: What do you wish you knew at the beginning of your career that you know now?
A: Hmm - that’s a tough one. Because what I know now, I need to know now, and what I knew then, I needed to know then. You learn as you go along, and that’s the journey. If I knew the things then that I know now, I might not have gone on this journey. If I knew it was so much hard work - well, I would have done it anyway, but it might have been discouraging.
Q: Are you recognized on the street? Do you do your own shopping?
A: In Los Angeles, I do my own 20 percent of the time. I’m just not around enough to do that all the time.
I get recognized. There’s a certain portion of my day which I spend shaking people’s hands and saying hello and signing an autograph. Ninety-nine percent of the people, that’s all they want. “Hey, I love your music,” or “Boy, my cousin’s crazy about you, would you sign this thing?” It takes a minute, and that’s OK.
Sometimes, I can be in certain situations where, like, I love going to bookstores, because everyone’s looking at books, and no one’s looking at me. I can do fine there.
Q: When, if ever, will you release a live video or a live recording?
A: We have been slow in providing that. Instead of me coming into your living room, you have to come see me. It’s sort of a career move.
One reason is that I think my live performance is my greatest asset, and in this day and age, when it’s hard to bring people out and go to a concert, they will come out to see me.
I see it in the future that we will release something like that.
Q: Which gay rights organizations do you financially support, and do you do so in a significant way?
A: The ones I find myself involved with, in all kinds of different levels, are the National Gay and Lesbian Task Force and the Human Rights Campaign.
Q: What do you think the Internet has done for your career?
A: I don’t know about my career, but what it has done for me is give me instant access to fan response. When I have a television performance, I can go on-line and read what people think about immediately. Whereas before, the only response I got was from reviewers, someone who gets paid. Who says they like my music to start with?
Q: Are you still going to be in the upcoming movie about the life of Janis Joplin? (Etheridge is slated for the title role).
A: As far as I know. It’s moving right ahead. I’d say we’ll start filming in April or May. I’m terrified; its wonderful (laughs).
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MEMO: This sidebar appeared with the story: CONCERT Melissa Etheridge will perform at 7:30 tonight at the Spokane Arena. Tickets are $35, available at G&B Select-a-Seat outlets or call (800) 325-SEAT.