A friend told us about a guy who arrived at a gathering and discovered there was going to be lots of food.
“If I had known, I would have worn my buffet pants,” he said.
Buffet pants. Presumably they are loose-fitting, at least around the waist, and can comfortably accommodate major feeding activity.
Anyway, our friend thought it was a terrific Spokane phrase. We agree.
In fact, we would like to hear people work it into conversations several times a day. And to that end, here a few usage options just to help you get started.
“Lunch? I’d love to. Do I have time to change into my buffet pants.”
“Well, I thought he was wearing suspenders because he had discovered the ‘80s or something. But it turns out those were his buffet pants from last Thanksgiving.”
“That’s a pretty blouse. It would really go with my buffet pants.”
“No, I’m not a rapper-wannabe contemplating grabbing myself. These are my buffet pants.”
“Him? Nah. He’s a newcomer to Spokane. Doesn’t even own a decent pair of buffet pants.”
Frightening Flashbacks Department: “When I was 8 years old, my family and I went on a vacation to Disneyland,” wrote Colbert’s Lindsey Smith. “While standing in a long line for a safari ride, my dad all of a sudden let out the loudest Tarzan roar. For about five minutes afterward there was no one standing within 10 feet of him, including his family.”
No Inland Northwest weekend is complete without:
“Rain.” - Mary Carli
The best time to call and tell us all about your Web site: 2 a.m.
They thought they wanted to live in the country but it turns out they’re afraid of the dark: A reader named Leslie who lives in a rural area near Cheney wrote to complain about people building huge view-destroying houses near her, including one featuring exterior lighting that makes the place “Look like an airplane coming in to land.”
Earning customers for life: Citing service above and beyond, readers touted Sub-Division, Perfection Tire on North Division and After Image Visual Services in Moscow.
Today’s Slice question: How would you rate Spokane’s elevator etiquette? (Our grade: C+)
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MEMO: The Slice appears Monday, Tuesday, Friday and Saturday. Write The Slice at P.O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; fax (509) 459-5098.
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