Memories, Traditions Make Mother’s Day Special Time

People often complain that holidays have become too commercial, but they don’t have to be. I’ve always believed that holidays, birthdays and anniversaries should be personal and special - and this is particularly true of Mother’s Day.

Breakfast in bed is the classic indulgence. I remember preparing this for my mother, Martha Kostyra, when I was young.

Years later my daughter, Alexis, would bring me a beautiful breakfast tray on Mother’s Day morning. And every year she and her father would plant a garden for me.

My favorite was the garden of 12 beautiful tea-rose bushes at my home in Westport, Conn. It was the beginning of my rose collection. That garden still grows, and it always makes me think of Alexis.

I recently asked my mother what she recalls about Mother’s Days when my brothers, sisters and I were young. She remembers them as always being sunny, with all the neighbors outside visiting with each other. We’d also go down the street to my grandmother’s house.

My father would give my mother a corsage and a bouquet made up of flowers he’d picked from our garden.

The idea was to “give Mother a day off,” so we kids would cook dinner. Even so, she always baked a special cake or pie for all of us to enjoy.

After reminiscing with my mother, I talked with a couple of friends about how their families celebrate Mother’s Day.

Madge Miller, who lives in New York City, has two daughters who are now grown. She says that when the girls were small, they would entertain their parents on Mother’s Day. They’d write and sing a song and make dinner, complete with a handwritten, elaborately decorated menu.

This tradition continues today - though in a more sophisticated way. Now the sisters invite their parents to dinner in one of their apartments.

Marjorie Rosen, a friend and neighbor in East Hampton, N.Y., has fond memories of the Mother’s Day when her two sons, now 17 and 20, gave her portable filing cabinets to hold all her gardening catalogs and the articles she clips.

“They wanted to help me get organized,” she says. “I continue to use the file cabinets, and they always remind me of how thoughtful they are.”

The most memorable Mother’s Days seem to happen when families find ways to create personal, significant celebrations.

You don’t have to spend a lot of money to make Mom feel special. Another great way to celebrate Mother’s Day is with an afternoon tea. If the weather is nice, have the party in the garden.

Crumpets and scones are authentic English tea-party choices, but muffins, cookies or a cake can also be wonderful. Offer spreads such as jams and jellies, honey and lemon curd.

You’ll also want to make plenty of elegant little tea sandwiches. Here are recipes for three of my favorites:

Tomato, basil and ricotta tea sandwiches

(Makes 8)

8 slices white bread

1/2 cup ricotta cheese, seasoned with salt and pepper

2 small ripe tomatoes, cut into 1/4-inch slices

8 basil leaves

Using a round cookie cutter, cut a circle of bread from each slice. Spoon ricotta on each round.

Place a tomato slice on each of four rounds, top with a basil leaf and cover with remaining rounds. Cut in half.

(Prep time: 15-20 minutes. Cooking time: none)

Smoked salmon and endive tea sandwiches

(Makes 8)

6 ounces cream cheese

1 scallion, finely chopped

4 slices black bread

6 ounces smoked salmon, thinly sliced

1 head endive, leaves separated and washed

In a mixing bowl, beat cream cheese with a wooden spoon until soft. Stir in scallions.

Spread mixture in a thin layer on bread slices. Place salmon on two of the slices; top with endive. Cover with remaining slices of bread, pressing down gently.

Refrigerate sandwiches until firm, then trim edges, forming rectangles. Cut lengthwise into quarters.

(Prep time: 25 minutes. Cooking time: none)

Caramelized onion and mascarpone tea sandwiches

(Makes 8)

2 teaspoons butter

2 small sweet onions, such as Vidalia, finely chopped

4 slices raisin bread

1/4 cup mascarpone or cream cheese

Heat butter in a medium skillet over medium-low heat. Add onions and cook, stirring often, about 15 to 20 minutes, until they are brown and caramelized.

Remove from heat and let cool.

Spread mascarpone or cream cheese over bread. Distribute onions over two of the slices and top with other two slices.

Refrigerate until firm. Trim crusts and cut each sandwich into four rectangles.

(Prep time: 10 minutes. Cooking time: 15-20 minutes.)

MEMO: Questions should be addressed to Martha Stewart, care of The New York Times Syndication Sales Corp., 122 E. 42nd St., New York, N.Y. 10168. Questions may also be sent to Stewart by electronic mail. Her address is: mstewart@msl.timeinc.com.

The following fields overflowed: CREDIT = Martha Stewart New York Times Syndicate