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Boston Goetz its man

Darnay Hoffman, the attorney for New York subway vigilante Bernhard Goetz, added a twist to the legendary Curse of the Bambino when it was learned Goetz will relocate to Boston.

As Hoffman put it, “They told us, ‘New York got Babe Ruth. We’ll take Bernhard Goetz.”’

Suddenly, it all came into focus for Boston Globe columnist Dan Shaughnessy: “There. Bernhard Goetz is the player to be named later in the 1920 deal that sent Babe Ruth to the Yankees. Now everything makes sense. It’s perfect. … Bernie riding forever ‘neath the streets of Boston. The Curse of the Vigilante. Bambino for Bernie, straight up. This explains what we’ve been seeing all these years.”

Even Seinfeld can’t take George’s act

According to the New York tabloids, Yankees owner George Steinbrenner is steamed at the producers of the hit TV show “Seinfeld.”

Steinbrenner reportedly filmed a segment in which he appeared as himself, and it was supposed to be used in the season finale later this month.

But Steinbrenner’s scene has been edited out of the final episode, and some are wondering whether the chopping of the Boss was a bit of revenge against Steinbrenner for past transgressions.

Remember: In an earlier episode this season, the character who plays George Costanza’s father ripped into the Steinbrenner character for dealing Jay Buhner to the Mariners.

Southern hospitality

Homeless people may be getting the bum’s rush out of Birmingham, Ala., before the Olympic soccer games that start there July 20. Someone apparently has shipped dozens of homeless people to Huntsville from Birmingham in recent months, according to social workers and an aide to Huntsville’s mayor.

They said several homeless people have told shelter workers they were given one-way bus tickets and $10 to get out of Birmingham.

Sounds like a deal to us.

Enough to make them hurl

Among the items thrown onto the ice at Winnipeg after the Jets’ last National Hockey League game were a can of blue paint and a hubcap.

Not to mention the towel.

Disorder in the court

Talk about self-incrimination. Matthew Simmons, a 21-year-old soccer fan, was convicted last week in London of provoking an attack by soccer star Eric Cantona a year ago.

When Simmons heard the verdict, he jumped over the courtroom railing and over a bench, seized prosecutor Jeffery McCann from behind in a headlock and ripped McCann’s tie off. Some witnesses said Simmons appeared to kick McCann in the chest as he swung his legs over the bench.

Simmons dragged the prosecutor backward by the throat before eight security guards intervened. Simmons, meanwhile, was screaming, “I’m innocent!”

The last word …

“To become a television lightweight, Dick Versace would have to move up a couple of weight classes.”

- New York Daily News columnist Mike Lupica

, DataTimes ILLUSTRATION: Photo

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