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Gimme a D, gimme a D-minus …

What’s that spell? Well, in Inkster, Mich., it spells “eligibility.”

The school district in the Detroit suburb will lower its academic standards for athletes, abandoning a policy that allowed them to play only if they passed six classes with a C or better. Now an athlete will only have to pass four classes with a D-minus.

Because of the higher standards, the Inkster baseball team forfeited its 1993 season, and this year’s football team, with only 15 eligible players, is 1-6.

“Our previous policy destroyed sports in Inkster,” superintendent Jim Rutter said. “You don’t kill the victim to make the system work.”

Hey, pal, if you only have 15 kids in school who can pull Cs, your system doesn’t work.

Apology accepted? That’s an endorsement!

Reggie White wants a new sheriff in town.

The Packers’ defensive end isn’t satisfied with an apology he got from Brown County Sheriff Mike Donart for his use of an unauthorized photo of White in a campaign ad. The problem: Donart removed the photo, but still used White’s name in a subsequent ad.

“His people said it was great publicity for him. I’m ticked off,” White said.

The ad shows White in his Packers uniform with the caption that the Packers wouldn’t trade White if he missed a tackle and voters should not reject Donart in today’s election over one incident. It was a response to criticism from Republican challenger John Hinz that on Donart’s watch in August four inmates escaped from jail.

Consultant Stephen Eichenbaum claimed the $238 ad generated up to $30,000 worth of publicity.

“We wanted to do something to get people to focus on the issues,” Eichenbaum said.

The issue being, what? That Donart is an unethical dimwit who can’t stop jailbreaks?

Not that there’s anything wrong with that

Britain’s first all-gay rugby club - the King’s Cross Steelers - has been accepted as a full member of the Surrey Rugby Football Union. The club, formed a year ago in the Central Station pub, has played three matches and lost them all.

Club chairman Rob Hayward said the AIDS issue in a sport where bloody injuries are common hasn’t kept the Steelers from finding opponents.

“People we have played against have admitted they raised the question amongst themselves and came to the conclusion there was not a problem,” he said.

Right. As long as they practice safe rugby.

Uh, the name is familiar

Robert Parish, joining the Chicago Bulls for his 21st NBA season, was asked what it’s like to play for coach Phil Jackson after long ago playing against him.

Said Parish with a laugh, “I didn’t play against him, but I remember him.”

Commented Phil Rosenthal of the Chicago Sun-Times, “In truth, Jackson was playing for New York and then New Jersey during Parish’s first four years in the league. But they say memory is the first to go.”

The last word …

“Maybe our goal in the off-season should have been to find as many Indian artifacts as we could. Actually, there’s some good coaching stuff in there once you get through the self-serving stuff.”

- Knicks coach Jeff Van Gundy’s catty review of Bulls coach Phil Jackson’s book, “Sacred Hoops”

, DataTimes ILLUSTRATION: Photo