Some Do Cross That Special Line

Men would be shocked to learn how many women have a fantasy lover. Most of the time they stay a fantasy. But every now and then, they become a reality.

Holly: “I was totally in love with Daniel for three years. When he broke it off, I thought my world would end. Three years later, I married Jason, but even on my wedding day, I thought of Dan. Each year, when the new phone book came out, I looked for his name. I loved Jason when I married him, but I was not totally, crazy-in-love with him the way I was with Dan. I knew that I would have a good life with him.

“I had been married for 15 years when I saw Dan again. I was glad that I saw him, but once I did, I closed that chapter of my life. I didn’t fantasize about him anymore. I knew finally that it was over. But I began fantasizing about other men and about having an affair. I wasn’t content with Jason anymore.

One month before our 24th wedding anniversary, I began an affair. Now, a year and a half later, it is still going on. Looking back, I think I should have married someone I was crazy about. Maybe then I wouldn’t have been searching and fantasizing all these years. I’ll probably always be with my husband, but I know I will never be totally happy. And that’s sad. An affair, I’ve found out, is not the answer. There is so much sadness that comes with it, but I can’t seem to break it off. I’m lonely in my marriage and lonely in my affair.”

Lana: “Nearly 40 years ago, when I was in high school, I fell in love with my best friend, Marlon. He would drive me home and we talked, laughed, hugged and kissed. We were both somewhat shy, but not with each other. I told him everything,

“Strangely, he never asked me on a real date. There were only those ‘by chance’ meetings. I dated others, but frequently thought about my soulmate, Marlon. I never knew who he dated, or if he did. I assumed he was a more private person than I, or that because he lived in a more upscale neighborhood, he dated girls in his own world.

“After graduation, we didn’t see each other for more than 30 years. We both married and had children. Over the years, if I thought I saw Marlon in a crowd, I’d rush to get a better look. But it never turned out to be him. I always attended class reunions, but Marlon didn’t. Then, out of the blue, eight years ago, he walked into one. My heart did such a number on me. I was recently divorced, Marlon was happily married. We went for a drive and stopped to talk, laugh and kiss. He told me that he had loved me so many years ago and that he hoped that I’d grown fat and unattractive. I had not. He was more handsome than ever, but more importantly, still so comfortable to be with.

“I was finally able to ask him why he never asked me on a date. He said I always seemed to be dating someone and he thought I would turn him down. Once more he disappeared from my life. How I wish I hadn’t told him everything in those days. The most beautiful part of our relationship, that we could talk about everything, was the jinx. There will be another reunion in a year. A small part of me hopes he doesn’t show up. A very small part.”

Martha: “For 35 years I thought of Ted and wanted to call him. But my husband was a very jealous man so I didn’t. Then my husband died and I still didn’t make the call. A couple of weeks ago, I was sitting on the deck, overlooking the bay, with a perfect sunset, and I told my dearest friend, that if I had one priority, it was to call Ted. My friend found his business number for me. The very next morning I called, only to find out Ted had died two months before my husband.”

xxxx