December 12, 1997 in Features

The Slice Hey, Where’s The Bus Stop Guy?

By The Spokesman-Review
 

Always remember that the sight of you walking your dog or standing at a bus stop could be a part of several strangers’ morning routines.

And maybe, just maybe, they’d miss you if you weren’t there.

How not to impress girls: This soft-faced boy got on the bus at Lewis and Clark High School. He started talking to a girl across the center aisle. The subject of orthodontic braces came up. In highly animated fashion, he described his own. And at one point he reached deep into his mouth and extracted a rubber band.

He held it up as if it were a trout.

The girl looked as if suddenly she didn’t feel so good.

Megan Davis, 3, said to her mom one recent cold morning: “Look, our lawn has frosting on it.”

The difference between Spokane and Seattle: Seattle has this incredibly strange call-in porn show on the public access cable TV channel late on Saturday nights.

Spokane doesn’t.

Slice answers: The majority of responding readers said, no, most Spokane area drivers are definitely not reasonably courteous.

Overheard during a preview of “The Postman” before a movie at the Spokane Valley Mall: “Hey, it’s the Cliff Claven story.”

Clarification: More than a few readers misunderstood our intent in saying that a teenager smoking alone is an especially sad sight.

So let’s try again.

It’s unfortunate. But some kids smoke around their peers. Chalk it up to the time-honored belief that it makes them look cool.

But the sight of a teenager smoking alone, simply to be having a cigarette, seems doubly pathetic.

What the Inland Northwest needs is: More folkloristic snow forecasting methods. So let’s add these to the list.

1. When your dog starts wearing a baseball cap backward, it means a blizzard is coming.

2. When Marianne Mishima reads the news while wearing earmuffs, it means the white stuff is on the way.

3. And when your cat types “Bring water dish in” on the computer, it means it is going to snow.

Warm-up question: What’s your facetious fall-back plan for making a buck in the event you lose your job? (We used to say, “Well, there’s always selling Grit.” But we’re not sure that publication still exists.)

Today’s Slice question: What would Dr. Seuss have titled a Christmas story set in Spokane?

, DataTimes ILLUSTRATION: Color Photo

MEMO: The Slice appears Tuesday, Thursday, Friday and Saturday. Write The Slice at P.O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; fax (509) 459-5098. We’re not at the office today. So leave your impression of the barking dogs’ “Jingle Bells” on our phonemail.

The Slice appears Tuesday, Thursday, Friday and Saturday. Write The Slice at P.O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; fax (509) 459-5098. We’re not at the office today. So leave your impression of the barking dogs’ “Jingle Bells” on our phonemail.


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