These Rockers Perform For Themselves, Us, U2
Fitting with its design to be the THE rock group of the ‘90s, U2 announced its world tour in a Manhattan Kmart on Wednesday.
The group, which entered the jam-packed store wearing sunglasses and hugging supporters, sat near the lingerie department under a sign that read “Pop Group.” Such words as “enormous,” “gigantic” and “incredible” proliferated.
According to New York Times critic Neil Strauss, the quartet performed a song “which sounded like U2 imitating Oasis imitating the British Invasion bands of the ‘60s.”
Added Strauss, “During an instrumental bridge, the band’s singer, Bono, wheeled a shopping cart down an aisle, handing out tacky panties and stuffed animals to journalists.”
Loose talk
An audience member to Julia Roberts, who was honored as Woman of the Year by Harvard’s Hasty Pudding Theatricals (as reported by the Associated press): “Julia, will you marry me?”
Homer and the rest of the family send their regards
Matt Groening turns 43 today.
Just wondering - how many of those are hairdressers?
So, you think Martha Stewart does it alone? Turns out it takes a “very organized” staff of 150 to run what the 55-year-old domestic goddess calls Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia.
We see Cancer Man as the matron of honor
A poll of internet users indicates that love abounds in “The X-Files.” Stars David Duchovny and Gillian Armstrong were named most romantic couple by an informal poll on DirecTV’s website. With more than 70 percent of the respondents being male, the runners-up couples included Ted Danson and Shelley Long from “Cheers,” and Larry Hagman and Barbara Eden from “I Dream of Jeannie.”
She’ll hang the citation on her front porch
The Alaska Legislature wasn’t happy when singer Jewel pulled out of last year’s state fair. But all was forgiven when the 22-year-old Alaska native was named Best New Rock-Pop Artst at the American Music Awards last month. The Alaska pols voted her a citation.
Weddings? Like the Oasis, they’re just a mirage
What’s up with those nutty Oasis boys? Well, after younger brother Liam Gallagher called off his planned wedding to actress Patsy Kensit (ostensibly because of the impending media storm), elder brother Noel Gallagher called off his wedding to girlfriend Meg Matthews.
She’s just in it for the autograph
O.J. Simpson may has lost much of his popularity, and he could be on the verge of losing his fortune. But he may have a girlfriend. Christie Prody is tall, blonde and she works at the Sunset Marquis Hotel in Los Angeles. “I’m not dating him,” Prody insists. “I’ve just met him a few times. He’s a nice person.”
, DataTimes ILLUSTRATION: 2 Color photos
The following fields overflowed: CREDIT = Compiled by staff writer Dan Webster