January 5, 1997 in City

Bottom Lines A Satirical Look At Topics In The News

 

This is simply the natural order of things …

Seattle receives 20 inches of snow and is immediately showered with emergency aid, national news coverage and general sympathy. Spokane receives, what, 50 inches of snow and gets referred to as a suburb.

He was up to his wings in water

Gov. Mike Lowry toured the area’s disaster areas on Friday. Nothing could be more fitting. Standing knee-deep in flood waters is the perfect job for a lame duck.

He should be rewarded for his honesty

People say they don’t understand why Newt Gingrich still thinks he should be speaker. As a parent, I understand it perfectly. After a kid finally admits that he broke the window after months of disavowing all knowledge, he will always say, “Punished? Just for telling the truth?”

All together now: “Stand by your man…”

Our own Rep. George Nethercutt, R-Wash., says he “has seen nothing that would disqualify Mr. Gingrich from serving as speaker.” Apparently, he’ll see it the day after Gingrich is re-elected.

Have the Democrats gone completely nuts? What are they thinking?

I’m sorry, but I don’t see why the Democrats would even want to get rid of Gingrich. That’s like trying to get Wrong Way Corrigan kicked off the opposing team.

, DataTimes ILLUSTRATION: 3 Photos

MEMO: Bottom Lines is Jim Kershner’s look at issues in the news. The views are the writer’s.

Bottom Lines is Jim Kershner’s look at issues in the news. The views are the writer’s.

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