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The Spokesman-Review Newspaper
Spokane, Washington  Est. May 19, 1883

The Slice Check Early Warning Signs Of Trouble On Hoopfest Team

You know your Hoopfest team’s practice is not going well when:

1. Half of your coed players refer to defense as “harassment.”

2. It’s clear that your tallest player’s only skill is shouting “You the man!” when someone misses a layup.

3. The guy you had counted on for scoring sits down after about 30 seconds and says, “It’s Miller time.”

4. Children point and laugh.

5. Somebody’s using a hockey stick.

She’d rather be in denial: “Recently I took my 13-year-old granddaughter, Brittany, for clam chowder - one of her favorites,” wrote Lila Wieber.

When the chowder came, the girl put in a lot of crackers. But before long she was heard to say, “Yuk.”

Wieber asked her what was wrong.

“I saw a piece of clam,” she answered.

That’s why it’s called clam chowder, Wieber explained. It’s made with clams.

Brittany didn’t want to hear it. “I can’t stand to see the clams,” she said.

Time keeps on slippin’ into the future: Willard W. “Pete” Thomas attended his granddaughter’s graduation at Eastern Washington University not long ago. (She’s a third-generation EWU grad.)

The experience prompted Thomas to reflect on the passing of time.

“I thought as we were leaving that you can tell you are really getting old when all the new buildings on the campus were named for people you knew.”

Here’s a band name we’d like to see, inspired by something we saw: Roof Dogs of Peaceful Valley.

Don’t like that one? OK. How about The High Drive Dogs.

Karen Arndt has a question: What were these people thinking?

She recently observed two intriguing demonstrations of obliviousness.

1. A man at the head of a line of traffic leisurely riding his bike up Grand at 5 p.m. on a weekday with headphones on. “Duh-h-h-h-h!” wrote Arndt. “It’s guys like him that give commuter bikers a bad rep.”

2. A woman at a South Hill grocery store who ducked away from the checkout aisle as the cashier was ringing up her purchases. “We’ve all forgotten the milk and made a dash to the back of the store, but this lady didn’t come back,” Arndt reported. “Several minutes later the checker went looking for her…she was still shopping.”

Today’s Slice question: What’s the one thing it actually makes sense for people around here to buy in bulk?

, DataTimes ILLUSTRATION: Drawing

MEMO: The Slice appears Tuesday, Thursday, Friday and Saturday. Write The Slice at P.O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; fax (509) 459-5098. Call 838-4277 to find out about the summer schedule of carillon recitals at St. John’s Cathedral.

The Slice appears Tuesday, Thursday, Friday and Saturday. Write The Slice at P.O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; fax (509) 459-5098. Call 838-4277 to find out about the summer schedule of carillon recitals at St. John’s Cathedral.