The Slice Consider Yourselves Warned
If you are visiting Spokane this weekend, here’s a tip.
“All you can eat” isn’t an invitation. It’s an attitude.
Memorable tantrums, Part 2: “I was traveling on a bus one night with my 2-year-old son and 6-week-old daughter,” wrote Hilla Holloway. “My son decided that he had been on the bus long enough and started screaming. The bus was darkened and most of the passengers were asleep. I couldn’t stop the scream so I pinched him firmly on his bottom, which at least made him cry and he fell asleep eventually.”
Upon learning that there was still another flight to board, Eric and Julie Lee’s toddler-age son fell to the floor in the Hong Kong airport and announced, kicking and screaming, “I NOT WANT TO FLY ON AN AIR-O-PLANE ANYMORE!”
The lad rallied a short time later. “I feel better now, Mom,” he said.
Three reasons Rat Pack slang sounds ridiculous in Spokane:
1. When you say something like “Chicky baby,” nobody can tell whether you are trying to be cool or are just unwittingly retro.
2. It’s not 1961 and this isn’t Las Vegas.
3. Not many people here admire affected boozy swaggering.
Readers’ nominations for the title “Least arrogant journalist in the Inland Northwest”:
Slice readers’ customer service awards: Carol Baker gives one to River Ridge Hardware. Elizabeth Doering salutes Honda of Spokane.
And a friend who was feeling under the weather went to the Rosauers on 14th to buy soup and crackers. The checkout clerk figured out that our friend was not well and said “What about 7-Up?” Our friend said “Oh, yeah,” and the clerk scurried off to get some.
Civil Defense siren, Part 2: How many longtime Spokane residents remember the day back during the Cold War when, by mistake, the siren was sounded on Tuesday instead of Wednesday and at least a few people thought World War III had started?
Warm-up questions: What local employer has the most married couples on its payroll? What’s your best driver’s exam story? (We flunked the road test twice when we were 16. Hey, YOU try parallel parking a 1965 Pontiac Bonneville.)
Today’s Slice question: What other popular Spokane activity ought to be clocked and alphabetically reported (with names and finishing times) in the newspaper?
, DataTimes MEMO: The Slice appears Tuesday, Thursday, Friday and Saturday. Write The Slice at P.O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; fax (509) 459-5098. Prerace Beer Loading hasn’t been shown to enhance Bloomsday performance.