Call Them The Doomsday Dolittles Cowboys Generate Some Offense, But Still Can’t Score Many Points
In Texas, they fondly remember the days when Bob Lilly and Dallas’ Doomsday Defense ruled the NFL.
Worry not, good Texans, Doomsday is back.
But here in 1997, Doomsday returns to the Big D in the form of offense.
And on a day like Sunday, even when Dallas’ Doomsday Offense was good, which it hasn’t been through the bulk of five games this season, it was bad. Brutally bad.
Coming into the game against the New York Giants, the Cowboys ranked 20th in the NFL in rushing, 21st in passing, 22nd overall and had yet to shove All-Pro runner Emmitt Smith over the goal line.
Sunday, Doomsday came in odd and disturbing forms.
The Cowboys generated a season-high 27 first downs, converted 9 of 17 third downs, churned up and down the Meadowlands turf for 428 net yards, averaged 5.3 yards over 81 plays and kept the New York defense on the field for an astounding 40 minutes, 37 seconds.
And produced all of one touchdown in a 20-17 loss.
“Statistics don’t mean a thing. Only one statistic counts,” said beleaguered Doomsday coach Barry Switzer, who knows the end is near. “The better team got their butts kicked today because they beat themselves.”
A recap of offense lost: 10-play, 61-yard drive over 6:08 for … a field goal; seven-play, 28-yard drive over 2:45 for … a field goal; nine-play, 71-yard drive over 4:59 for … another field goal; and 14-play, 75-yard drive over 4:24 for … finally, a touchdown.
But quarterback Troy Aikman, despite 317 yards passing in 52 attempts, would like to have one third-quarter toss back. Giants’ defender Tito Wooten intercepted the pass and returned the ball 61 yards to put Dallas behind for good.
Appropriately, the game ended with Dallas driving toward a potential game-tying field goal, but the clock ran out before 328-pound tackle Erik Williams could drag his blubbery self 30-some yards downfield in time to get set so the Cowboys could kill the clock.
It was a fitting end to a frustrating day for the Doomsday Offense, which outgained New York 428-166 in total yards, but again struggled inside the 20, scoring on just one of four trips. Dallas, ranked No. 27 in red zone coming in, now has 14 field goals to six touchdowns.
Trade rumor mill
Today is the trade deadline, but don’t be surprised if it passes quietly. Unlike in the NBA, NHL and Major League Baseball, the NFL trade deadline traditionally doesn’t ignite a flurry of panicked general managers wheeling and dealing in an effort to save their jobs.
In the last five years, there have been all of seven trades made at the deadline and only two in the last three years. And we’re not talking household names.
Last year, there was one deal. Miami got underachieving tight end Troy Drayton from the Rams for tackle Billy Milner. In typical trade deadline style, Drayton remains an enigma and Milner is out of the league.
Da coach’s wife
While Mike Ditka’s return to Chicago made for big news in the Windy City, his wife Diana made big news in New Orleans, where it became clear the Saints coach’s bark is nothing like his wife’s bite.
Apparently, Diana Ditka, wandering around the team’s training facility last week, stumbled into a few of her husband’s players.
“Listen, if you guys don’t win in Chicago, don’t even bother to come back,” she reportedly told the players.
The Saints have struggled, but Diana said, “Mike’s not a quitter. I told him, ‘It took them 30 years to screw this place up. You can’t win in one year.”’