Tableside Manner Serves Others Well

When Gayland Tofte first donned his trademark white shirt, black bow tie and shined shoes, dining out was marked by dedication and a will to please his customer.

That was 26 years ago, when a dinner party was truly a dinner party, when it was not unheard of for a group of diners to spend four hours enjoying a meal.

They might spend “Oh, three, four, maybe five hundred dollars in an evening,” Tofte said, “but they had a memorable experience.”

Now, much to Tofte’s disappointment, “eating in even the finest of local dining rooms is a turn-and-burn situation,” he said. “Management is, I think, way too concerned about getting the people in and getting them out for the next group. Sure, often the food is good, but the service is certainly not what it used to be.”

Tofte is for certain one of the area’s finest waiters, as attested by his loyal following of diners.

“It sounds conceited, I know, but there is a group of some 20 people that follow me wherever I go to work,” he said. “It makes me feel extra special when a longtime friend and customer comes into the restaurant and wants to be seated in my section.”

Satisfied customers aside, Tofte is seriously considering giving up the wait profession.

“First of all,” he said, “I’m 44 years old. You just don’t see many waiters my age. Why? Easy, you can’t keep up with the younger waiters. To make a go of being a waiter, you have to run your tail off. Your job as a waiter, is to wait on the customer - wait on his every demand.”

Tofte has worked 26 years as a waiter for some of the area’s finer dining establishments, including Spokane’s Ridpath and former Red Lion hotels and Templin’s Resort in Post Falls. He’s now working at the Red Lobster in Coeur d’Alene.

“You know, I can put customers into one of three categories,” he said. “There’s the guy who comes in, either by himself or with a friend. He buries his face in the menu and doesn’t say too much when you ask how you can help him. You leave this fellow alone as best you can.”

The second group, Tofte said, is “the average guy, the family man who’s out for a pleasant evening. He expects to be told of the day’s specials and be adequately taken care of during his meal.”

Then, the third group of diners, Tofte’s favorites, “are the ones who stand up when you approach them, waiting to shake your hand. He introduces you to his family and guests and expects the best service.”

Tofte obliges.

“More often than not, I will have recognized the customer and his guests when they enter the door,” he said. “I’ll have water, coffee and/or their favorite drinks waiting at the table for them,” he said. “A favorite appetizer will have been ordered. You address him by name and greet his group with as many of their names as you know. I’ve always enjoyed each group. … I’ll miss the many people.”

Waiting has been financially rewarding for Coeur d’Alene’s Tofte, who said a good night in tips could amount to $200. An average night might mean $50 to $75 extra.

“My best night, oh, I remember during the opening nights at a Post Falls resort, I might take home some healthy money, upward of $500,” he said, referring to his days at Templin’s. “But that was after 10- to 12-hour days.”

A good waiter, according to Tofte, “is the guy who can leave his personal troubles, problems, at the door when his shift starts. Nobody wants anything to do with your troubles. And your troubles show through in your speech, your attitude, your willingness to wait on them,” he said.

“Next, you have to learn to judge people in the first few minutes you wait on them. Talk to them. Listen to what they ask of you. Waiters these days are far more interested in the party after their work shift to pay attention to their customers,” he said.

Embarrassing moments in the wait profession?

“I guess it would be the first and only time I ever spilled something on a customer,” Tofte said. “Spilled a full glass of red wine on a diner’s white coat.”

Tofte admitted he’ll miss the days, some 20 years ago, when waiters cooked at tableside, preparing steak Diana, scampi, hot spinach salad.

“Yes, those were the fun days,” he said. “People would spend three hours in a dining experience. Now, well it’s a different situation. One I don’t care for … so, it’s time.”

Tofte’s wife, Nora, is a Coeur d’Alene beautician. Their two children are grown.

, DataTimes MEMO: Tom Burnett is a free-lance writer and former journalist from Rathdrum. Panhandle Pieces appears every Saturday. The column is shared among several North Idaho writers.