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To Dave, A Sex Fiend In Need Is A Friend Indeed

Typically sharp-tongued talk show host David Letterman is taking some heat for failing to fry his friend, Marv Albert.

Time magazine calculated that “Tonight Show” host Jay Leno has told more than 40 jokes about the disgraced sportscaster, compared to precisely zero for Letterman.

And, the magazine noted, Albert has appeared on Letterman’s “Late Show” and its NBC predecessor an estimated 100 times.

When asked about the situation, Leno came to Letterman’s defense.

“Marv Albert - I understand that perfectly,” Leno said. “Dave is a close friend of Marv’s. He did exactly the right thing.

“If it were Jerry Seinfeld or a close friend of mine, I wouldn’t make jokes about him, either.”

Loose talk

Donald Trump, on his new flame, 31-year-old lingerie and swimsuit model Kara Young: “She’s irreverent, funny and smart … and dangerous.”

Too bad nobody’s invented an AgeMaster

Suzanne Somers turns 51 today.

In Marv’s case, that would be lies like a rug

San Francisco 49ers scout Mike Faulkiner, whose ex-wife Heather is Marv Albert’s fiancee, told CBS Radio he knows why she’s standing by her new man: “Heather’s hanging in there with Marv because she’s going to get money. She’ll marry him. He’s going to take care of her. It’s all about money, and it’s all about lies.”

She’d rather not be one of the ‘in’ crowd

Chastity Bono says life has been easier since she came out as a lesbian in 1995. “What’s hard is living your life a lie and continuing in fear that somebody’s going to find out this thing you’re ashamed of,” said Sonny and Cher’s little girl. “That’s all that being ‘out’ means - it’s just not lying. It’s talking freely, acting freely, like heterosexual people do.”

She really is Lucy in the sky with diamonds

Cry your hearts out, heterosexual guys: Lucy Lawless, the statuesque, 6-foot star of television’s “Xena: Warrior Princess,” has announced her engagement to Rob Tapert, executive producer of “Xena” and its sister, er, brother show, “Hercules.”

Bet he didn’t expect her to pony up like that

When horse trainer John Endicott decided he wanted to marry Melissa Rivers, he first asked her mother, Joan Rivers - who gave him her blessing, along with wedding rings that had belonged to her and her mother. Endicott combined them with the diamond he had already bought into a single super-ring.

Guess they had a bigger blimp budget back then

Tom Arnold has been named grand marshal of the 66th Annual Hollywood Christmas Parade on Nov. 30. Arnold was co-grand marshal with his former wife, Roseanne, in 1992.

, DataTimes ILLUSTRATION: 2 Photos

The following fields overflowed: CREDIT = Compiled by staff writer Rick Bonino