Cheap Seats
In need of a few good men
The Clearwater Valley (Idaho) High School football team will have to wait a while longer before starting the season.
The school was supposed to open the season Friday night against Kamiah but had to call it off due to a lack of players. Coach Dave Wright and principal Dave Snodgrass said they were concerned they would have to use up to eight ninth-graders and were worried their players would get hurt going up against more experienced opponents.
“It’s my responsibility never to put any kid on that field that can risk injury,” Snodgrass said.
“The fact that we’d be playing a 250-pound senior (on opposing teams) against a 130-pound freshman who’s never played varsity in his life after playing on a junior high team that never won a game. … The safety of the kids has to come first.”
Mismatches never seem to bother the University of Nebraska football team. Can you say Akron?
Shock treatment
When New York Yankees manager Joe Torre called on infielder Wade Boggs to pitch an inning against the Angels, Yankees coach Don Zimmer was at a nearby hospital picking up some medication.
“If he looked up and saw Boggs pitching,” Torre said of Zimmer, “he probably thought he was hallucinating.”
Iron Mike takes some air out of Jordan
One guy who is not impressed with Michael Jordan and his Chicago Bulls teammates is Mike Ditka, the former Chicago Bears coach now with the New Orleans Saints.
“I don’t care if they win nine NBA titles,” Ditka said. “The ‘86 Super Bowl was the greatest thing to happen to Chicago sports.”
Ditka’s Bears beat New England 46-10.
Do you suppose those hits Ditka took when he was a player are finally starting to have some effect?
No change in mental capacity
Robbie Buhl suffered a concussion when he crashed during a test session before an Indy Racing League event at Pikes Peak Raceway and missed two races before coming back to win a race.
“When the doctor examined me and said I’d scrambled my brain a little bit,” Buhl said, “I tried to tell him that’s the way I always am.”
Slapped down like a bad Dawg
Five years ago, Steve Emtman was the hottest item in college football. The former University of Washington standout was the first player taken in the NFL draft by the Indianapolis Colts.
Last week, this is what San Francisco 49ers coach Steve Mariucci said after cutting him: “We were looking for him to be a little quicker and stronger and more active.”
Other than that, he was fine.
The last word …
“The trade seems logical enough. Both are big guys. Both like to score. Both need to be burped.”
-Teddy Greenstein of the Chicago Tribune, commenting on the trade rumor that had Seattle SuperSonic Shawn Kemp and Toronto’s Marcus Camby switching teams
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