Some Have Many Regrets, Others Few
If your married life was on one great big video, would you rewind it and savor every moment? Or would you hit the erase button?
Sophie: “At any other time, including now, I probably would not have married my husband. I met him when I was young and innocent. I’m sure a shrink would say I was trying to marry my father. I figured marrying someone who was mean to me was God’s way of giving me what I deserved. I’m 20 years wiser, thanks to time and therapy. I’m still married and trying to make the best of a not-so-great situation. If I had it to do over again, I would find someone who treated me like the jewel I know I have inside of me.”
Gary: “Absolutely, without a doubt in my mind, I would marry my wife again. I would savor every moment. The only regret I have regarding my wife is not having made her acquaintance earlier in life. We met about eight years ago and have been married almost three years. Our love, bond and understanding for each other continue to grow with each day. My wife works full time in addition to taking four courses per week in night school. This might seem like a strain on a relationship, but not on ours. I honestly believe I’ve found the perfect spouse for me.”
Gloria: “I’m happy with who I married. I married my best friend and someone whom I find exciting to be around. We met in 1983, started dating in 1985 and married in 1987. I have never regretted committing myself to him. As in all relationships, we have had our challenges. Together we have seen them through. We do not lead exceptionally exciting lives. We have three children, a house and jobs. We create excitement through each other.”
Richard: “If I had it to do over again, I would have married my first love. It’s like they say when you’re taking a standardized test: Stay with your first choice. I wish I had applied that to choosing a wife. I fell in love when I got home from Vietnam 20 years ago. I wasn’t ready for much of a relationship, so I let her go. Five years later, I married my wife because there were things about her that reminded me of my true love. My marriage ended in 1990 and to this day, I think about the one that got away.”
Sarah: “There have been times that I have hated my husband, but I’ve never regretted marrying him and I’d do it again in a minute. It’s like with a child. You don’t always like them, but you’d never wish you didn’t have them. My husband has put me through enough trials to fill a book, but I am connected to him in a way that defies explanation.”
Sherry: “I got married for probably the stupidest reason you can imagine, because all my girlfriends were getting married. I didn’t want to be the old maid, so I married the guy I was dating. I did not love him. I was 21. I didn’t even know what love was. I thought shopping for towels and matching shower curtains was love. I can’t believe I stayed with him for 10 years. I gave up 10 years of my life I’ll never get back.”
Trudy: “I don’t know if I’d marry my husband again, if I could do it over. I can’t imagine life without him, but I do wonder what might have been. Maybe I should have waited to get married. Maybe I should have married someone with more money. Maybe I should have married someone who wanted a big family. I have a lot of questions, but a lot of love as well.”
Scott: “I was suckered into marriage by the oldest trick in the book, she got pregnant. I did what I considered the right thing, now I consider it the stupid thing. I married her. There hasn’t been a day in the past seven years that I have woken up next to this woman and not wondered why I was there.”
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