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In The Air Of Not-Her-Gate, Language Is Important

So, what with the allegations being thrown at President Clinton, how are the top three anchors handling the resulting media frenzy?

CBS’s Dan Rather isn’t enjoying it at all. “I hate it,” Rather told the Philadelphia Inquirer. “I wish I didn’t have to deal with it at all - the graphic sexual nature, the tawdriness, the sleaziness of the whole story.”

Rather joins ABC’s Peter Jennings in refusing even to say the word semen. Jennings prefers to use the term “bodily juice.”

“There are ways to make yourself clear without being utterly graphic,” Jennings says. “I’m not comfortable talking about oral sex in public or private.

NBC’s Tom Brokaw will say what he needs to. However, he adds, “At this point, I think the whole country would like to take a shower.”

Loose talk

Sleaze-talk host Jerry Springer on how his show can save on the defense budget (in the Washington Post): “We’re in 50 countries, and once they see the show, they totally lose interest in trying to take us over.”

The party will be held at, where else?, the Great Northern

Sherilyn Fenn turns 33 today.

Imagine if her brother’s first name was Louie…

When Woody Harrelson, 36, married girlfriend Laura Louie on Jan. 11, she was asked whether she would take his name. Louie, 32, said, “Actually, now you can call me Woody Louie.”

The plaintiff’s new script: ‘Twisting in the Wind’

Steven Spielberg, author Michael Crichton and the rest of the folks responsible for the film “Twister” were found innocent of ripping off Stephen Kessler’s screenplay. Kessler, who contended that “Twister” was based on his script “Catch the Wind,” tried to shake Crichton’s hand after the verdict was handed down. But the author refused. “I’ve never heard of this person until the lawsuit came out,” he said later.

As Harry Truman insisted, ‘The buck stops here’

In Germany to promote his film “As Good As It Gets,” Jack Nicholson was asked what he thought about the sex-oriented allegations facing President Clinton. “What would be the alternative leadership?” he answered. “Should it be somebody who doesn’t want to (have sex)?”

Yeah, some whines are timeless in their appeal

As he wrote in Cosmopolitan magazine, Tom Arnold saw his stock rise when he got divorced from Roseanne. “When I got divorced, back in 1994, I felt like a failure. I was not only a one-time loser but also secondhand goods,” Arnold writes. “But then I thought about it and realized that times have changed. Secondhand clothes are now called vintage and are incredibly popular.”

Then there’s always www.badtaste/

If you do a bad deed, it’s known these days as “doing a Monica.” For more, check out such Monica Lewinsky-themed Web sites at or any of 290-odd others.

, DataTimes ILLUSTRATION: 2 Photos

The following fields overflowed: CREDIT = Compiled by staff writer Dan Webster