‘Star-Spangled Men’ Fun, Engaging Read
“Star-Spangled Men: America’s Ten Worst Presidents” by Nathan Miller; Scribner (272 Pages, $23)
If good intentions pave the road to hell, surely the electorate pauses every four years to decide if we’re on a shortcut or an exit ramp.
Indeed, as Nathan Miller makes clear in “Star-Spangled Men,” even the worst of our 42 presidents - just like the best of them - have truly believed the decisions they made (or avoided) were in America’s best interest.
That aside, those Miller elevated to his 10-worst list have little in common. Their faults cover a variety of sins - from over-weaning pride to sheer stupidity, alcoholism to sloth. Even presidents acclaimed as “best” come in for dings: The author notes that Teddy Roosevelt dubbed his Mount Rushmore compadre Thomas Jefferson “perhaps the most incapable Executive that ever filled the presidential chair.”
Like all best/worst rankings of the presidents - they seem to have begun in 1948 - Miller’s is highly subjective and guaranteed to provoke a howl or two. That seems to be its point … and its payoff: “Star-Spangled Men” is a slim volume and an easy read; more time can easily be spent pondering or arguing its conclusions than flipping its pages.
From 10th-worst to barrel-bottom:
Jimmy Carter, who accurately campaigned as what he was - a total outsider - but proved too inexperienced to really grasp the reins of governance. Miller says Carter “showed that the White House is not the place for on-the-job training.”
William Howard Taft, whom Miller faults for being relatively lethargic.
Benjamin Harrison, a nobody who did virtually nothing and had a handshake “like a wilted petunia.”
Calvin Coolidge, who was content to let millionaires run the country in the years before the Great Depression - the economic catastrophe that Big Money helped bring about.
U.S. Grant, whose advisers stole the country blind in the days of the robber barons.
Andrew Johnson, who tried to thwart the will of Congress and effectively put civil rights for blacks on hold.
Franklin Pierce, a Northerner who was cozy with Southern firebrands in the decade before the Civil War. Pierce, who could have done something to head off that conflict, was more interested in being cozy with a booze bottle.
James Buchanan, the consummate politician and ditherer who between 1857 and 1860 did nothing to keep the Union together. He comes across like Mayor Quimby of “The Simpsons.”
Warren Harding, an ignorant goof-off with brilliantly crooked cohorts and advisers.
Last - and most dangerous, by Miller’s lights - is Richard Nixon, who “tried to make off with the Constitution itself.”
For the final kick in the pants, there’s an epilogue where Miller takes on Thomas Jefferson (“undeniably a great American, but he has difficulty qualifying as a great president”) and John Kennedy. JFK is faulted for promising a lot but delivering little in social programs and civil rights; also for recklessness that led to standoffs with Cuba and the quicksand experience of Vietnam.
The author’s background is in newspapers (he covered politics at the Baltimore Sun) and his prose is straightforward. Though the ordering of the list yanks you forward and back over close to 200 years, Miller is great about giving relevant scene-setting and perspective.
“Star-Spangled Men” is fun and engaging. And it makes it clear that the voting public has often been out to lunch: At least half of the Bottom 10 won landslide presidential elections.
The good news is that the occupants of 1600 Pennsylvania Ave. aren’t the end-all/be-all of national government: By Miller’s lights, we’ve had back-to-back turkeys on three occasions - Pierce-Buchanan, Johnson-Grant and Harding-Coolidge - and still managed to survive.