live

On the Web: Wheely weird

Once there was a time when scaring children was thought to be the only way to teach them a lesson. Consider the 1963 bicycle safety film “One Got Fat,” directed by Dale Jennings and available for viewing at www.archive.org/ details/OneGotFa1963.

In this morbid gem, a group of bicycling children make bag lunches, don monkey masks for some reason, and head to the park for a picnic, only to fall victim to a number of road hazards when they don’t follow the rules. Surely the children’s fates – which involve steamrollers, open manholes and assorted mayhem – taught plenty of youths to use hand signals.

Quick hits

Sure, it’s a commercial. What’s it for? Who knows? Who cares? It’s so, well, BEAUTIFUL. Many, many colored balls. Bouncing.

To a stirring indie rock soundtrack. Ah. www.bravia-advert.com/ commercial/ braviacommhigh.html

“It feels like Groundhog Year.”

Colorado coach Gary Barnett, after receiving the news that the Buffaloes were going to the Big 12 title game because Iowa State lost by a field goal in overtime for the second straight year.

See Dick eat dog food. Yum, Dick, yum! “Eight Is Enough” patriarch Dick Van Patten is the name and face on a new dog food that,

the Associated Press

reports, “claims to be indistinguishable from a home-cooked meal for humans.” Putting his mouth where his money is, Van Patten recently chowed down on some at a media lunch. (No word on what the media was served.) “Not too bad,” Van Patten said of his “Dick Van Patten’s Natural Balance Eatables for Dogs.” Find it online at www.naturalbalance- inc.com.