The Slice: Many factors determine bliss or miss

TODAY THE SLICE salutes the wedding season with a one-question multiple-choice quiz. Which sort of nuptial ceremony tends to lead to the longest-lasting marriages?

A) Small, simple, short. B) A three-ring circus so expensive its economic impact reverberates through the Inland Northwest for months. C) All that really matters is that the bride and groom are old enough to know better. D) Civil wedding. E) One where the parents did all the planning and made every decision. F) Church wedding uniting two people who never go to church. G) One that starts with eloping. H) One capped by a performance kiss and those in attendance barking “Woo-hoo!” I) A knot-tying featuring a bride and groom who possess decent conflict-resolution skills. J) A ceremony joining two people who have gone through divorces. K) One that’s just like a fairy tale except that the bride and groom are selfish and immature. L) A sitcom scenario where the best man and maid of honor loathe each other. M) One where both people understand this will put a crimp in their dating. N) An exchange of vows captured on home video by 16 people scrambling to get the best angles. O) One followed by a reception that resembles a riot. P) A ceremony matching two people who realize saying “I love you” is the easy part. Q) Other.

“Spanning the globe for localized snapshots: That’s Slice reader Pam Pierson and the IN Life section in Italy last month.

“Situation on the ground: “Every Memorial Day weekend, my daughters and I go over to the coast, where all our departed family members and many friends are buried,” wrote Joan McKenzie.

They place flowers on the graves and fondly recall the individuals in question.

This year, at a cemetery across a bay from Anacortes, they found a family member’s tombstone cordoned off with orange tape.

A killdeer, a bird that often nests on open ground, had placed its eggs next to the grave marker. This feathered parent seemed to take no notice of onlookers, said McKenzie.

“We quietly placed our flowers at the edge of the fencing and wished her and her family well, smiling with the knowledge that life does, indeed, go on.”

“The last to know: A reader who had just started chemotherapy decided to go ahead and shave his head before he began looking scraggly. Checking the results in some mirrors, he discovered a tanned area on the back of his head.

“A jolting way to discover my bald spot,” he wrote.

“Warm-up question: What percentage of Spokane area residents can say “Howdy” without appearing to be affecting a folksiness to which their background and lifestyle does not entitle them?

“Today’s Slice question: What Inland Northwest county courthouse looks most like it should have been the setting for the trial scenes in an old movie?