I know what you did last summer, pal
“OK, OK, OK, settle down.
“Now!
“OK, my name is Mr. Grippi, with an i at the end. Yes, it is Italian.
“And yes, my family is connected.
“That’s better.
“Now we’re going to complete a time-honored assignment for the first day: What I did over the summer.
“Who would like to go first? Anyone … anyone … Bueller? Where is Mr. Bueller?”
“He’s sick. I hear he’s dying.”
“Thanks. Anyone else. OK, if no one is going to volunteer, I’m going to pick somebody. Let’s see …
“Mr. … WIAA – did I pronounce that correctly? – you’re up.”
“Yeah, you got it right. But I didn’t do nothing.’ “
“You had to do something Mr. WIAA. Please continue.”
“Well, I’m supposed to come up with a name for the new classification I’m creating, but I just couldn’t decide. But I did scope out four choices. But they’re all pretty lame.”
“Well what are they?”
“You really want to know? Jeez, get a life you (something unintelligible).”
“Mr. WIAA, do I need to send you the vice principal’s office?”
“No. OK, I’ve settled on either 6A, 5A, 4A, 3A, 2A, 1A or 5A, 4A, 3A, 2A, 1A, B or AAAA, AAA, AA, A, BB, B or 4A, 3A, 2A, 1A, 2B, 1B.”
“What?”
“Ya, I know. I had sorta settled on keeping everything the same and add a C at the end, but some of the little guys on my block didn’t like it, so I bailed. Now I’m stuck with this …”
“No profanity in my class Mr. WIAA. So who wants to go next?”
“Wait, I’m not done. I did decide that I’m putting one of the state basketball tournaments in Seattle starting in 2007.”
“Which one?”
“The 3A, wait, that’s not what it will be called. Crud. The one that will take the 3A’s place. You know, the one with all the Seattle schools. The cool thing is I have to move it back a week because I’m gonna use U-Dub for part of it. So the 4A, the biggest schools, will move ahead a week.”
“You mean the same week as the B tournament, pardon me, I mean whatever tournament we have here?”
“Yeah, so? What’s the big deal?”
“The big deal is, Mr. WIAA, if you are a fan of the Greater Spokane League and the B, you won’t be able to see both anymore.”
“That ain’t my problem.”
“Isn’t, mister. That isn’t my problem. OK, anyone …”
“I still got more.”
“I thought you said you didn’t do … never mind, what else?”
“Well, when my little sister was running in the state track meet last spring at Eastern, I lost track – hey, stop laughing, that wasn’t a joke – of her for a bit when she went behind the stands. Anyway, my dad didn’t like that, so I think I might switch the meet to the Falls this spring.”
“What do you mean, you might?”
“I haven’t made up my mind yet. The meet’s been at Eastern a long time, but there’s no big old bleachers in the way, either.”
“Thank you. So is there anything else you would like to share?”
“Well, I’m just kickin’ this one around. I might move the date when high school coaches have to stop coaching their kids up to July 1. My mom is tired of having to drive me to eight different sports every day during the summer.”
“July 1? But we don’t get out of school until June 16. Won’t the basketball coach and the football coach want you at the same time?”
“Probably, but that ain’t … isn’t my problem. They can work it out.”
“You’re right. They do such a good job of that now. Anyone else?”